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Name: Hong Qi Xuan Likes
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Sunday, February 19, 2006 Moments for Sat, 18th Feb 2006 :
Morning woke up quite late...Then on my com..well well, my 2nd sis brought a shocking news 2 me..Well she told me ytd, fri , at ard 9pm + 2 10 pm +, she n her husband saw my past in the mrt, holding hands wif a guy, 2gether wif a female friend, sitting down..Well well, this news if i heard in the past, will totally shattered my heart, but now, i'm relax though it still affects me (not as severe like the past). Hmm it really pays a great price 2 see wat a person really is... I have seen a lot of her, but even until now, she has been lying 2 me all this while.. i was on phone wif my past on fri morning, 1am + n she told me things which was just a lie, n this morning her lies were revealled by my 2nd sis =) Thanks god one after another 2 revealled the lies she has given me n let me noe wat type of person my past is.. kw, roy, Jq n me agreed 2 meet 2pm at sem mrt 2 go outing...Well heard the rest going suntec, but didn't ask me, so nvm =) Finish updating my blog, its so late, chat wif dawn regarding same old problem again...But she's like "away from keyboard" (afk) most of the time n her reply was so slow...So nvm i go prepare...time was late n i say gdbye 2 her but no reply, so i went off....Go arcade, kw n roy was here..So was kit, Ns and Jx... All of them were giving faces..jx got come n talk 2 me.. Then they just left wifout even saying gdbye 2 me... Nvm patience is wat i have =) kw n i challenge XI til Jq comes as shes late... Finally she come n we went mac 2 eat while waiting 4 her... Well while eating, roy told me he say hello 2 Ns n he heck care him, lol then the topic becums Ns n his grp, now who used 2 be a big happy grp in the past, but now split in2 two.. Finally now a noe the whole truth... They r so unhappy abt me, but its ok =) Roy showed me wat Ns sms him, Ns told roy tat he'll regret going out wif me, lol wat a joke...Lol if u all r so unhappy abt me, just say so, dun need 2 be a timid person, talk behind my back, doesn't even behave like a man, n yet always called me "gay", though i won't be affected by all these hurtful remarks =) cuz after, different ppl have different views and afterall, who are "gays" n behave like 1, u should noe it urself..=) Cuz from observations, ppl can see tat u r not behaving like a real man at all n tat's wat others think so too... To Ns, Kit n Jx, if u guys out there doesn't regard me as a friend, its fine wif me. =) Dun need 2 talk back behind my back, stand up like a man n talk 2 me like 1, since u find tat i'm a "gay", which according 2 ur actions n behaviour, u all doesn't behave like a man at all, so i believe u dun have the rite 2 judge a person, if u r not a role model of a man urself =) When u guys r in need, i'm always there 4 u.. Need my help, come find me, n now u talk back behind my back, but everything is fine wif me =) To Ns, If u dun regard me as a friend, on Valentine's Day, Dun seek help from me 2 buy presents 4 some1 u like.. it makes me feel more tat u r more like a hypocrite, wearing a mask in front of me... To kit oso, friend u want 2 be like tis, its ok 2 me, if u guys choose 2 go 2 ur own outing, wifout inviting me along, i'm ok,if i'm not welcomed.. since u guys choose 2 go out urself, then i'll plan my own activities then.. I'm always a relaxed n calm person, n moreover a patient person now..I won't be totally affected by all these from u guys... If u all wanna treat me as a friend, then do it sincerely n truthfully, step up 2 me like a man, n talk 2 me.. To put all these stupid, immature things aside, we proceed on our way 2 our destination after wen n Br suddenly joins our grp..Then 6 of us went 2 take mrt.. halfway, i 4get is i call dawn or she call me...Cuz our prob was really getting very worst... n i finally voice out everything tat was bottled inside me 2 her... Well i told her the 3 things tat was holding me back, from opening up my heart 2 her.. 1st is of cuz my past... 2nd is..becuz of dawn.. her unable 2 decide wat she actually wants, makes me feel insecure cuz of my past, tat i'm afraid 2 be love again, cuz i'm afriad i'll be hurt once again... 3rd, the most major prob was, she's still young...after growing up n changing a new environment, her feelings 4 me might change...n i'm looking 4 a serious relationship... I dun wish 2 enter 1 relationship, whereby i feels tat we won't be 2gether 4 the rest of our life in the end... tat's really makes me so insecure tat really holds me back a lot... We chat a lot of stuffs even until paradiz centre, they r playing 9-feet pool, i was still chatting wif dawn..Well her mum noes abt my presence le n she might allow her 2 go out wif me on weekends haha wat a pleasant surprised..It really pays 2 be truthfully n sincere to ur friends or rather 2 every1... Dun always puts on a mask in front of anyother ppl ard u..as it really looks awful when the mask was taken off n see ur true colours... I always believed in living my life upright =) Well after finish chatting, i go n join them play pool...halfway, suggest br 2 play a game of billard wif me...it took us 1hr + 2 complete the game -.-! i win him by 52 points lol... Then go back play a few games of pool...btw...during billard...wen n br so intimate..really makes me buay tahan.. can u small couple spare a thought 4 a single man like me? at least automatic la, later who still dare 2 go out wif u 2 =P public place ok? haha. then really makes me no mood 2 play lo, wait 4 u 2 to finish hugging while playing... So we only manage 2 play a short while until ard 8 pm and i n kw go 2 a food court nearby 2 have dinner... the rest have 2 go home early -.-! so we bid them farewell...Then after tat, i n kw went 2 ps arcade 2 play..lol i n him challenge kof XI, i win him, he win me... n we had lots of fun... He's still a strong opponent... n its very challenging... Then we join forces n challenge ppl kof 02...only 1 token, we win by 7 until nobody challenge, n we left 4 home... lol tat's all 4 2day ba... bubbles of sadness. |