About Me

Name: Hong Qi Xuan
Old Name : Hong Yilun
Nick 2: Justin Hong
Nick 3: Takeshi84
Nick 4: Ishitkawa Keigo
Nick 5: Hibiki Satoshi
Birthday: 11th October 1984
Age: 25 yrs old
Blood Type: A+
Email: Yilun_Takeshi@hotmail.com

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Thursday, January 01, 2009

Finale of the year 2008, arrives 2009

Well, its time to sit back n think of the things tat happened in this yr 2008. It has really been a very rough yr for me.. Many things ended wif a downs.. and i'm terribly affected badly.. 1st n foremost, was my love path..It has undergo many rough times n perhaps its ending just the way we started it.. Started off wif a 3 ppl, ending up wif 2 for the time being, n now, its back to 3 ppl.. But this time, the person who is out of the cycle, is me..

Anyway its really over le ba. this time rd.. Perhaps they have already progress further. Replaced me n FH has started.. Yup this person is too strong n the present me is simply too weak.. I'm out of this hurtful r/s.I wish to end tat bad nitemare of mine, every nite..a particular nite, i have a bad dream, n witness painful things in the dream.. In the dream, she admited FH. Its completely over.. I dun wish to wake up wif sweat n tears in my eyes..

i'm out of job too.. even at such a bad time.. i'm jobless.. i'm very down now.. my studies were affected.. can i really graduate? Family ties are not gd.. everything seems so bad.. i felt so lost, so helpless.. my future seems so bleak.. wondering how am i able to break free from all this n overcome all the problems lying ahead...Is there any1 who can really be there for me?

This morning, bidding farewell to 2008, welcome 2009..its a bad start.. nope many frds wishes me greetings, but all except a person who doesn;t even bother to send me a reply, a greeting or watsoever.. I could have figured out..He's wif her.. Perhaps on tat fateful nite, FH has took place..Since he got a car, always travelling to her hse, such thing could very well be expected to happen..

besides tat, i even had a bad dream.. THis time is abt me.. How would you think, if some1 tells you that you might not be able to live past this yr? Hmm i really begin to think abt the word spoje to me in my dreams.. Even though few hrs have past since i dreamt it, its still as fresh in my mind.. Yup if i'm not able to live past this yr, How did i die? Peacefull or violently?when will it take place?

There's a nite when i was standing outside the lift at the level of my floor, talking to ben on the phone.. i accidentally dropped the umbrella on to the ground lvl.. is tat a phenomeon? that thud sound was solid.. i reached the ground floor, the tip of my umbrella head cracked n parts of it chipped off.. A human's bone will become like this after the fall, i supposed.. too much tots in my head.. i even had a big bump on my head while alighting from a bus, which sent me into dizzy spells.. i tot i was gonna concussed on the spot..

I have to cease thinking now...


bubbles of sadness.

*2:22 PM .

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