____________['[*Moments Sharing*]']___________

*11:45 AM .

Monday, February 27, 2006

Moments for Sun, 26th Feb 2006 :
Hmm wake up very early, but end up overslept n was late 4 breakfast haha... Well We had mac 4 breakfast n chat wif them until they decide 2 play some cards game... Thus kw went 2 7-11 2 buy a deck of poker cards n we play microsoft hearts 2gether. However cuz a Jc bro of mine, was surprisingly having some luv problems n thus we agreed 2 meet out... Rush home 2 prepare, however was abt 2 leave the hse when my eldest sis brings her baby daughter 2 my hse, n my day was immediately brightens *wink* haha i just love babies... Hmm Well nxt time will try 2 take some photos n added it in2 the blog 2 make it more interesting n not only words which is boring... -.-! Well wait until i get my hands on a digital camera (personal) b4 i do anything =) Thus cuz of late, i can only play wif her a while b4 rushing off..
Went amk mrt n meet Kwen.. COmpany him 2 k box 2 sing our hearts out n have our lunch there.. 3pm, we went 2 S-11 n have a hot drinks as my cough was really getting worst... Hmm after tat.. dunno y thought abt hp n we just went ard n see... Nxt, Kwen ask me 2 go have high tea wif him...-.-! those jc days wif him was like coming back haha.. Food, k box, pool, n few smalls things r wat kwen's gd at =P Thus he bring me 2 a place at amg n eat -.-! I have hot honey lemon n he bought whipped potato n crispy fries.. Hmm watching my diet thus i ate a little... After tat, we headed 4 a few rds of pool b4 bidding farewell... Hmm the pool there was great but pity tat it was little bit ex than parklane...
Nxt i alone went 2 Bishan J8 2 do some errands.. Well was kind of disappointed wif wat i saw in my own eyes... i think i dun wish 2 talked abt it here... Well after tat, i went back 2 sp 2 play kof XI.. Was surprise 2 saw 2 long friends... Dennis n panda.. Well was like a gathering, n we play 02 n XI 2gether.. Nxt we went 2 mac 2 chat n have dinner.. Then chat abt our old times until its time 2 headed home... Well work coming again -.-! Nvm..pay day is coming soon =P

bubbles of sadness.

*4:32 PM .

Moments for Sat, 25th Feb 2006 :
Well allow me 2 say something on this day. 25th a day 2 be remembered.. 2 yrs 6mths abt my past.. From now on, just only memories... Well ok enough of that, online play a bit of dota wif Kit n Roy, b4 going out meet Kw n Jx at sp. Play a few rds of Kof XI b4 we headed to Somerset.. Company then to heeren Hmv.. 2day's outing was full of misunderstanding btw the group of friends who used 2 b 2gether... But now, becuz of many things, end up spliting up..Wonder when will they start 2 grow up? -.-! the outing was split into many grps.. 1st grp Kw, Jx n me. 2nd grp Ns, kit, Dj, Roy, Jl, Jq and Sm, 3rd grp Wen n Br.. The rest like disappear into thin air...
There's no problems wif the 3rd grp, but main thing is the 1st n 2nd grp... Well as now, there's an increase in the lvl of privacy in my blog this days, i'll not revealled too much, however the most detailed person who noes the whole story, is none another than my bro, Roy. Yup i told him the whole pic n he gets every thing clear of all the misunderstanding of 2day's outing.. Nevertheless, i shall revealled little bit, but the misunderstanding won't be cleared inside here. =) 2nd grp went 2 parklane play pool, but cuz 1 of their grp member, Jl nv play pool, thus her bf roy, brings her 2 ps 4 a walk n my bro called me n asked 4 my location. Thus we agreed 2 meet at ps.. When we reached ps, Jq n Sm (grp 1) called jx tat they will be coming 2 find us... But at the same time, i called roy after i reach ps only 2 find tat he's back wif his rest of the grp (excluding jq n Sm)at foodcourt eating dinner...
Then cuz of lots of anti here n there, friends dislike one another...-.-! y so immature like a small kid? can't we all live wif peace n harmony? No 1 in this world is ur enemy... The only enemy is urself n u need 2 overcome urself... Haiz... Nvm abt tat... Then my grp, from 3 becums 5 n Sm wants 2 play pool, there she leads us 2 a place which i nv heard of, dunno call wat paradime or wat so ever, she claims ard park mall area -.-! Thus i just follow... N ends up in a stupid location which i dislike the most -.-! Erhmm Roy should noe after i talked 2 him. Then after tat, everything is a mess, n i had no idea where or wat the rest of the grp is doing..
Ok so the story is focus on my grp.. We play pool on n off. Y do i say so? cuz ppl who r waiting, went 2 play some viedo games...Hmm was very comical as in my grp, there seems 2 be a couple-to-be n tat's none other than Sm n Jx =P haha, i'm like a viewer, watching kw n jq in action, trying 2 bring Jx n Sm 2gether.. Seeing them like tat, makes me think of my younger days haha... Well after playing, we went 2 subway 2 have our dinner... Well 1st time trying but end up, its -.-! Perhaps i'm not gd in eating without utensils... Nvm anyway everything oso must try. After tat, we headed our way home.. Felt very bad 4 my bro roy, thruout the day as he's like the middleman, thus reached home call him n tell him everything n thus solve allt he misunderstanding... Nxt up was being told 2 have a conference talk wif Jx, Kw, Jq, Sm n Js. -.-!Ok nvm since i promised them even though i dun like conferencing, Joined in...
After so much things have happened, thus 2moro suppose 2 visit D's hse n went 4 an outing, but cuz i'm not mentally prepared, thus postpone it 2 nxt week. Sigh shy as i am...after so many yrs, i'm still unable 2 overcome this weakness.. Ok put tat aside 4 a moment, cuz thinking of tat, makes me nervous. Ok they agreed 2 meet 8am at sp mac 4 breakfast 2moro.. Wow... OK erhmm call it a day 4 2day...

bubbles of sadness.

*3:47 PM .

Saturday, February 25, 2006

Moments for Fri, 24th Feb 2006 :
2day was 3 mins late 4 work cuz of late nite -.-! Well went 2 work was so surprise tat this special VIP post in my tag box, thus we even had a great conversation in my tag box.. Well 2day was a finally weekends, every working ppl's most happiest day of the week.. Well enough of those boring work n we proceed 2 the time where my weekends starts. Well meet a friend at ps arcade 2 play kof XI wif him 2 relief my stress from work n other stuffs, besides we haven't meet 4 quite sometime.. He was late n after so long nv challenge each other, my skills has outshine his, thus won him most of the time...
Cuz we r quite hungry thus follow him 2 a music shop 1st 2 buy his cd,dunno wat super idol, kelly if i'm not wrong.. Well nv expect he's 25 yrs old n yet he is chasing after an idol -.-! Heard tat sat 4pm, he's going 2 get Kelly's signature. I'm not tat crazy of idols, thus i'm not companying him =P After tat we proceed 2 food court 2 have our dinner. It was indeed very crowded but we manage 2 find place eventually.. Well this friend of mine really won my admiration.. He will save $ 2 get wat he wants, but in terms of food, he is very thrifty.. No wonder he's fit n his figures are great.. Makes me thinks of the past b4 i went in2 a relationship.. My figures used 2 be very fit, but now, out of shaped =P Well was surprise 2 c Kit at foodcourt 2.. He was wif his ITE friends. So talk a bit n after having our dinner, i bid Kit farewell n we proceed 2 a arcade 4 a few rds of kof XI b4 my friend decides 2 go 2 his workplace 2 get a cheque.. Ask me 2 company me along, n i knew i will regret like last time. -.-!
Sits in his nice car n proceed 2 tanjong pagar n his workplace is coslab... He always wants me 2 work wif him, but problem is i need 2 think carefully n its high risk taking.. Y did i say i regret companying him? Cuz went there, he waited 4 his manager 2 be free, n i do ntg.. End up he told me, he'll be following them 4 supper.. -.-! since we r not going back 2gether, y ask me 2 company him along? Wat if later there's no last train.. Then i ask him when his manager will be free, but he say not sure, so ard 10.45pm i bid him farewell n faster proceed home..Besides my hp batt was almost flat.. Wat if ppl wants 2 contact me urgently but couldn't get me?
Reach home, prepare, watch tv n didn't expect 2 watch until 2 am b4 i retire 4 bed....

bubbles of sadness.

*9:49 AM .

Friday, February 24, 2006

Moments for Thurs, 23th Feb 2006 :
Hmm b4 i start, i would like 2 take this opportunity 2 welcome a very special VIP 2 my blog.. Was very honoured 2 have made a friend who's age, experience in life is much higher than me, 2 visit my blog. Take this opportunity 2 thank u n perhaps 2day my blog will be quite special.. Well 2 carry on as per normal, this morning was oso different from usual, cuz i didn't receive a morning msg like i always do .. Perhaps cuz of ytd's matter of replying her sms very late, tat's y she's quite upset wif me.. Well work was as per normal, except 4 a thing which happened...
Well its abt my ex colleague of mine during the times i'm working after my sec 4 O lvl.. in teachers resource centre.. Well i get 2 noe his family during tat CNY where i n my friend were invited 2 his hse.. He has a daughter Regina.. N at tat time, she requested me 2 be her penpal. We wrote letters but it only lasted a whole as i entered jc n she oso has her own busy study life tat we lost contact... However our contact were on n off..very seldom , i'll pay my excolleague a visit as promise.. Then until now, Regina told me abt having feelings 4 me back then in the past... Well was so surprise but in my point of view, she's still young n i believe she isn't ready 2 be committed in serious relationship... In my point of view, perhaps due 2 my 2 elder sis above me, they only have 1 bf n goes all the way until marriage now... I'm very envy of them tat they found their 1 n only true luv.. n i really hope 2 follow their path.. only have a serious relationship n all the way til the last breathe of ours.. But now.. i think its impossible as i already had 1 relationship tat doesn't turn out 2 be wat i expected... anyway life still have 2 go on n eventually, the rite 1 will show up in future... Thus i somehow, consider rejected her...but at the same time, she earned my admiration as a brave gal, who tells her feelings 2 a guy...whereby even i am unable 2 do it...
Well after work, was very stress thus i went 2 arcade play kof XI 2 relief my stress...Saw some of my friends there, so we challenge our skills n manage 2 win =) After tat, i went home 4 dinner.. watch a bit of tv n use com.. play a bit of dota, but wasn't a gd day cuz lots of leavers in the game n was really on form 2day... Nxt i play minesweeper flags (msn game) wif dominic my campmates, cuz the time was late, so we only had 2 rds... N its a tie... After which i call it a day...Nxt up was something 2 do wif my thoughts n wat actually happened 2day.. Well its regarding this special friend of mine, n i can understand her feelings 4 her daughter.. cuz if i'm a parents like her, i'll oso be like her now haha... In the eyes of parents, childrens are always not growing up.. Well 2 u, i might not be mature in my thinking, maybe perhaps ur lvl of maturity, 2gether wif ur age n exp, are way higher than me...
Hmm perhaps u might think tat my thinking of luv isn't mature enough, so how abt sharing my thoughts wif u, n perhaps 2 let u noe n understand me better.. However this will be a brief 1, as like wat i say, 2 understand a person fully, doesn't only takes 1 day, but takes even as long as many yrs... or maybe won't at all... Thus not 2 say understand a person fully, but at least understand him well enough... So words alone isn't enough, thus wat i state her will only be brief 2 =) Actions speaks louder than words... Well 2 me, True luv isn't tat simple wif the word of luv alone... Its made up of many factors tat combined 2gether 2 form it... In a relationship, trust, commitment, responsiblility, patience, understanding, giving in 4 each other n in fact many other things are a must...But wat lies above all is the heart 2 do all these things... These r the stuffs whereby a naked eye wouldn't be able 2 see it, but u need 2 use ur heart 2 see n feel it.. Thus i always believe in using ur heart 2 do watever things... Well was kind of having lots of thoughts, so perhaps i might seems like talking a foreign language, hard 4 readers 2 understand.. Thus i place my sincere apologies in advance...
With all these of the above, only will the relationship b strong, n be able 2 withstand n overcome all hardships n obstacles tat lies ahead of us.. Thus true luv isn't tat simple 2 find, yet its very important... Now i can be a child in the eyes of the parents, but in time 2 come, i'll have an own family of mine n i noe.. tat managing n maintaining a family, isn't any child's play... Its not very simple n lots of stress... U need 2 plan lots of things... the expenses, the future of the children n many other things.. Wif true luv, these obstacles in life, will be able 2 overcome... Thus everything needs 2 be mentally prepared.. Ok i'll say it briefly 4 this too... So tat's the reason, other than my 2 elder sis, i treated relationships very seriously.. Pardon me if i seems like not talking senses dear readers as i really have lots of thoughts in my mind, but perhaps i'm just not gd in expressing myself n maybe cuz i just dunno how 2 write them out.. Nevertheless, words proof ntg, but actions do... I think i'll have 2 stop here 4 2day as my head seems bursting haha...

bubbles of sadness.

*11:32 AM .

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Moments for Wed, 22th Feb 2006 :
Morning was punctual as usual... Cleared some of my work again... Lunch time meet art at ps kfc n had salad.. After tat went arcade play kof XI as he's getting more n more interested in the game... Manage 2 win but cuz time is short, we have 2 go off after tat... 2day suppose 2 meet my past, but thru out the whole working time until i knock off work, still no news from her.. As a promise, i'll still decide 2 go 2 the meeting location n wait 4 her... If by the end of day, she still didn't show up, i'll have 2 reconsider meeting her nxt time when she ask me out again... Finally she called n guess wat....
As usual, last min changes, wait until now then tell me.. Change location to Sun plaza, but i'm already at ps, so i was unhappy abt such an irresponsible act..Still as last time, our meeting time is supposed 2 be 6pm, but she's still in her bus 962 2wards sem... Late again n even want 2 change location last min.. Nvm... i tell her tat since i'm at ps, i won't leave as it waste my trip.. Thus i went 2 the arcade n wait 4 her instead.. When she come, wat she say doesn't even tally wif the fact n she can't even explained herself well 4 her reasons of all these last min changes n y she couldn't even contact me earlier... How am i going 2 trust her words?
Nvm... went 2 kfc 2 have dinner n i have salad again =) healthy diet... Everything wasn't like the past, we were like very awkward n there was always some moments of silence.. Watever she say always have loopholes n really makes me hard 2 believe in wat she tried 2 explain... After meal, just went 4 a walk n visit some places of our memories.. Well her appearance really changed, different from the past.. dyed hair, very long nails... etc..etc.. Well then talk bit here n there... She wants 2 be 2gether again as she regrets her decision very much... However...things aren't the same n not going 2 be tat easy anymore...
This is the 3rd time already...n the wounds i have was very deep.. Looking at her now, still the same as the past... The things which was lacked when we were 2gether, trust, security, n the inner luv from her heart wasn't there... Those love on the outer side when she meet me in the past, i already have, just lack the luv from her inner side... She's still the same as the past n things aren't same like the past anymore... If she really wants 2 win back my heart, it'll be extremely difficult 4 some1 who breaks my heart severely n 3rd time she chooses 2 leave me...The rest of the things, shall be keep inside my personal diary...Ard 12am... we took a train home...
Well reach sem, saw Lawrence my neighbour n walk home wif him... He told me a mth ago, he saw my past wif a guy at Northpoint -.-! Haiz i guess i have heard a lot of these n its like ntg fresh 2 me now... Reach home prepare n send sms to dawn as i noe tat i didn't reply her sms 4 the nite... She must be very angry ba... Well as my past 2 sms me when she reach home safely, but as usual, same as past, no news from her... Enjoy making ppl wait n worried 4 ntg.. Like tat wants 2 win back my heart? Makes me only think tat wat she's saying wasn't sincere n true enough tat she really wants me back to her heart... Still the same old her... She'll have 2 try even more harder this time 4 me 2 accept her...which is hard this time... Tired call it a day...

bubbles of sadness.

*9:10 AM .

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Moments for Tue, 21th Feb 2006 :
Same usual routine for work, but was not late for work, thanks 2 Dawn..but problems still lies... 2day i was extremely tired, but my work was getting 2 pick up, as stuffs r clearing more n more =) Ok so dun needa talk abt my monotonous workinglife =) However, 2day suppose to meet art 4 movie, but just as not organize as he is, Terence manage 2 ask me out after work..Went 2 ps buy a cup of my favourite ice cream, green mint n green tea, which i used 2 buy in the past, listening 2 my favourite music, i walk 2ward parklane 2 meet him.. Well since he's late, i went 2 the arcade n play a while...When he came, we challenge a few rds of kof 02 b4 proceeding 4 our dinner...
We had mac 4 dinner -.-! Well cuz i'm cutting down on my weight n not feeling well, i just buy a chicken foldover n a cup of hot tea... Then we proceeded 2 play billard...As expected, my skill is very low than Terence...He's 2 pro 4 me...However, the more challenging the game is, doesn't matter i lose or not, i'll be more excited =) 2 me, challenging wif a pro is nice, though humiliating, but i'll learn alot =) N true enough, we had a lot of rds none of them i won, but my skills gradually improved 1 game after another.. Training up my patience 2 aim 2 =) Still need lots of practices 2 train my placing of the white ball...We play 4 many hrs until 11.45pm like tat..b4 we go home...
I was so tired... Alone on the train home, listening 2 music again...Music has always been my life esp when i'm single =) Hmm nxt day was meeting wif my past.. Y bother asking me out when she doesn;t have the heart 2 meet me.. Not even a call 2 confirm anything..Everytime say she's changed 4 the better, but i really dun see or feel it in my heart...Anyway reach home 12.30am, prepare n retire 4 bed...

bubbles of sadness.

*8:59 AM .

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Moments for Mon, 20th Feb 2006 :
Well was very tired when i woke up, probably cuz i slept quite late last nite.. Dawn sms me n wake me up... Was punctual 4 work.. Then focus on my work.. though i was tired... Lunch time, art ask me out 2 eat wif him at ps... We had our lunch at Long John Silver..He was very late -.-! Some thing hilarious happen, art spills his drinks on the floor LOL.. Well we even have a gd laugh abt tat, n recall of my past when it happened 2 me... It was very embarassing indeed..After lunch, go outside starbucks 2 sit n chat.. We dunno y suddenly chat abt neopets.. Then rush back 4 work...
Chat wif roy n kit 2day... Well glad tat roy got back wif JL again..Dun regret n treat her well this time ok?Wish u both all the best.. As 4 kit, i told him the changes in our friendship, but he told me ntg has happened... Well nvm.. I noe something is wrong, but its ok, since he say everything's fine, then no point i think abt it... Just hope he got anything, just voice out...Well almost knock off from work, dawn n i having same old problems again.. Well in actual fact, ntg 2 write 4 2day as it was very boring.. Finish work, drop by at sp arcade 2 play a while b4 going home.. Saw michael n play kof 02 wif him.. He's still as camp as the past -.-! Then i change char n win him by 5 i think haha..Cr Duck was there 2.
Nxt i play XI wif carbon n Cr Duck, won them wif the mid bosses... Until the faggot from ps apeears...Wa...he/she getting more n more hard 2 win.. use malin, momoko, kula..-.-! girlish char.. Did manage 2 win him once...but lost a few rds...Then i n Cr Duck went home at ard 8.30pm..reach home, cannot use com... sian...Then watch tv n sms wif dawn abt the same old problems... Then mum offered 2 company me play Chinese Chess.. Hmm long time nv play le..Last time used 2 play wif my jc buddy...Now my skill rusty, 1st rd i'm winning but my mum win me in a stealthy way -.-! tat's not fair..Eventually, i win her the rest of the rds until she gif up haha.. After tat, watch tv again..
Well perhaps i took the cough medicine n i becum drowsy tat i feel very sleepy while watching naruto2..12.30am show..Then i fall aslp n wake up at ard 1.35am... Drag myself 2 prepare 4 bed n was very tired...Boring day, boring post... tat's all i can say...

bubbles of sadness.

*10:33 AM .

Monday, February 20, 2006

Moments for Sun, 19th Feb 2006 :
Hmm woke up ard 9am, then was infront of my com 4 long hrs 2day...Went starting, update my blogs 4 2 days..Then was thinking of playing dota...End up chatting wif my friends n chat wif Dawn too... Well same old problems arise... and she called me..So i chat wif her on the phone..At the same time, Dominic msg me in msn, 2 play minesweeper flag wif him..Haiz...was busy chatting wif Dawn tat he won me 5-1 -.-! After tat , i played dota wif Dragonboat (warcraft online friend) Didn't concentrate too =P but overall still manage 2 win in the end haha... Well we played a game of new ver n a game of old ver...
And of cuz not 2 4get the "little cutie" who visit my hse 2day *wink* haha she's none other than my eldest sis's baby daughter..Welcum her in2 my blog once again =) borned a day after my b'day *cheese* Wow seeing cute babies n seeing her, really brightens my day very much...She's the most wonderful baby gal tat really cheers me up alot, despite of so many stressful things in my life =) She gifs me hopes n replenish my energy 2 move 4ward...Omg i just love cute babies... Seeing her smile when i carry her n worried when she starts 2 cry..haha.. Well surprisingly, i had my lunch n dinner at home, cuz i really broke my record...I was on phone wif Dawn 4 the whole afternoon, where i actually planned 2 go out in the afternoon... Doesn't matter if i'm alone, cuz i can go out by myself n take a walk or wat =P
Ended up, i stayed at home until almost 9pm then i decided 2 go out... Went 2 sp arcade play kof XI for a while, n noe tat my sec sch bro, Derek was a woodlands civic centre wif her sis n her bf, n a female friend.Thus he asked me 2 join him.well so long nv meet, so i went there wif slippers, trackpants n a t-shirt -.-! Went there n had lots of fun, cuz long time nv sing le...But 2 bad..3 smokers in party world, wif only derek n i non-smoker...unlike K-box, no smoking... had 2 bear wif the smell of cigarattes in there... thought of going home b4 1am cuz promised Dawn tat i'll try 2 get home early, n some more i'm still sick but cuz i received a sudden call...a private no...
I was mentally prepared tat she'll call me sooner or later, cuz she might have read my blog... Yes..None other than my past.. Said many things..But she explained tat my sis n her husband saw the wrong person... But i really dunno who 2 believe... I dun think mrt was so big tat in the same cabin, 2 person can see wrong person? But when she explained, finally she confess tat a guy was going after her, which she didn't even mention it until i put in the blog abt the presence of a guy.. Then only she tell me tat a guy was going after her, but she reject him...Lol i dunno wat 2 say...Besides, she told me she regretted wat she did in the past when we were 2gether... Well...when we were 2gether, did she really cherish... until she lost the ppl who truly care 4 her n she starts 2 regret...Perhaps she really lied 2 me 2 many times tat wat ever she said, i really can't bring myself 2 trust her anymore... I won't trust any1 until i saw it wif my own "eyes" in my heart...
So we chatted until ard 2 am... N i prepared 4 bed, as promised, i sms Dawn so as 2 tell her i reach home safely... So as not 2 let her worry so much..

bubbles of sadness.

*9:03 AM .

Sunday, February 19, 2006

Moments for Sat, 18th Feb 2006 :
Morning woke up quite late...Then on my com..well well, my 2nd sis brought a shocking news 2 me..Well she told me ytd, fri , at ard 9pm + 2 10 pm +, she n her husband saw my past in the mrt, holding hands wif a guy, 2gether wif a female friend, sitting down..Well well, this news if i heard in the past, will totally shattered my heart, but now, i'm relax though it still affects me (not as severe like the past). Hmm it really pays a great price 2 see wat a person really is... I have seen a lot of her, but even until now, she has been lying 2 me all this while.. i was on phone wif my past on fri morning, 1am + n she told me things which was just a lie, n this morning her lies were revealled by my 2nd sis =) Thanks god one after another 2 revealled the lies she has given me n let me noe wat type of person my past is..
kw, roy, Jq n me agreed 2 meet 2pm at sem mrt 2 go outing...Well heard the rest going suntec, but didn't ask me, so nvm =) Finish updating my blog, its so late, chat wif dawn regarding same old problem again...But she's like "away from keyboard" (afk) most of the time n her reply was so slow...So nvm i go prepare...time was late n i say gdbye 2 her but no reply, so i went off....Go arcade, kw n roy was here..So was kit, Ns and Jx... All of them were giving faces..jx got come n talk 2 me.. Then they just left wifout even saying gdbye 2 me... Nvm patience is wat i have =) kw n i challenge XI til Jq comes as shes late... Finally she come n we went mac 2 eat while waiting 4 her...
Well while eating, roy told me he say hello 2 Ns n he heck care him, lol then the topic becums Ns n his grp, now who used 2 be a big happy grp in the past, but now split in2 two.. Finally now a noe the whole truth... They r so unhappy abt me, but its ok =) Roy showed me wat Ns sms him, Ns told roy tat he'll regret going out wif me, lol wat a joke...Lol if u all r so unhappy abt me, just say so, dun need 2 be a timid person, talk behind my back, doesn't even behave like a man, n yet always called me "gay", though i won't be affected by all these hurtful remarks =) cuz after, different ppl have different views and afterall, who are "gays" n behave like 1, u should noe it urself..=) Cuz from observations, ppl can see tat u r not behaving like a real man at all n tat's wat others think so too...
To Ns, Kit n Jx, if u guys out there doesn't regard me as a friend, its fine wif me. =) Dun need 2 talk back behind my back, stand up like a man n talk 2 me like 1, since u find tat i'm a "gay", which according 2 ur actions n behaviour, u all doesn't behave like a man at all, so i believe u dun have the rite 2 judge a person, if u r not a role model of a man urself =) When u guys r in need, i'm always there 4 u.. Need my help, come find me, n now u talk back behind my back, but everything is fine wif me =) To Ns, If u dun regard me as a friend, on Valentine's Day, Dun seek help from me 2 buy presents 4 some1 u like.. it makes me feel more tat u r more like a hypocrite, wearing a mask in front of me... To kit oso, friend u want 2 be like tis, its ok 2 me, if u guys choose 2 go 2 ur own outing, wifout inviting me along, i'm ok,if i'm not welcomed.. since u guys choose 2 go out urself, then i'll plan my own activities then.. I'm always a relaxed n calm person, n moreover a patient person now..I won't be totally affected by all these from u guys... If u all wanna treat me as a friend, then do it sincerely n truthfully, step up 2 me like a man, n talk 2 me..
To put all these stupid, immature things aside, we proceed on our way 2 our destination after wen n Br suddenly joins our grp..Then 6 of us went 2 take mrt.. halfway, i 4get is i call dawn or she call me...Cuz our prob was really getting very worst... n i finally voice out everything tat was bottled inside me 2 her... Well i told her the 3 things tat was holding me back, from opening up my heart 2 her.. 1st is of cuz my past... 2nd is..becuz of dawn.. her unable 2 decide wat she actually wants, makes me feel insecure cuz of my past, tat i'm afraid 2 be love again, cuz i'm afriad i'll be hurt once again... 3rd, the most major prob was, she's still young...after growing up n changing a new environment, her feelings 4 me might change...n i'm looking 4 a serious relationship... I dun wish 2 enter 1 relationship, whereby i feels tat we won't be 2gether 4 the rest of our life in the end... tat's really makes me so insecure tat really holds me back a lot...
We chat a lot of stuffs even until paradiz centre, they r playing 9-feet pool, i was still chatting wif dawn..Well her mum noes abt my presence le n she might allow her 2 go out wif me on weekends haha wat a pleasant surprised..It really pays 2 be truthfully n sincere to ur friends or rather 2 every1... Dun always puts on a mask in front of anyother ppl ard u..as it really looks awful when the mask was taken off n see ur true colours... I always believed in living my life upright =) Well after finish chatting, i go n join them play pool...halfway, suggest br 2 play a game of billard wif me...it took us 1hr + 2 complete the game -.-! i win him by 52 points lol... Then go back play a few games of pool...btw...during billard...wen n br so intimate..really makes me buay tahan.. can u small couple spare a thought 4 a single man like me? at least automatic la, later who still dare 2 go out wif u 2 =P public place ok? haha. then really makes me no mood 2 play lo, wait 4 u 2 to finish hugging while playing...
So we only manage 2 play a short while until ard 8 pm and i n kw go 2 a food court nearby 2 have dinner... the rest have 2 go home early -.-! so we bid them farewell...Then after tat, i n kw went 2 ps arcade 2 play..lol i n him challenge kof XI, i win him, he win me... n we had lots of fun... He's still a strong opponent... n its very challenging... Then we join forces n challenge ppl kof 02...only 1 token, we win by 7 until nobody challenge, n we left 4 home... lol tat's all 4 2day ba...

bubbles of sadness.

*9:49 AM .

Saturday, February 18, 2006

Moments for Fri, 17th Feb 2006 :
Wake up as usual, then meet wen 8am at sp mac...Have breakfast n chat lots of things there...saw sp mac, sally auntie...Finally she knew tat i n my past r not longer 2gether... She oso feels tat my past really cannot think maturely yet...But anyway its over..dun wish 2 mention anymore...Hmm i guess she must have misunderstand me n wen le, but i explained 2 her tat just a friend n she's attached =) until ard 9am + then only we left 4 marsiling mrt n headed 2 thr nearby poly clinic...
Well... expected, late comers wait alot down there...we spent hrs there... waiting... ended up ard almost 1pm then finish n i spent $40 on the clinic -.-! sad so ex.... Then we headed back 2 sp kfc 4 lunch...then go arcade wait 4 Wil, Roy n Jq...After tat, we all headed 2 our usual place, parklane... Well along the journey, expected the worst 2 happen... Br n wen... Haiz... wen's handling quarrel wif her bf, makes me remind very much of my past... Avoid, dun ans or reply br's call n sms... I can fully feel br's feelings...cuz i experience tat...its very painful... Remind of my past, makes me very sad.. Y can't settle things in a mature way..
In my opinion, going out wif guy friend, wen must discuss wif her bf earlier n tell her abt this matter.. Wif trust, br must gif her gf her freedom 2 go out wif any1 of her friend..But wen must be responsible enough 2 let br noe her whereabouts, where actually she can choose not 2...However, she got inform br abt this, so as not 2 make him worried n both must trust each other...From this, i can see there's no trust...tat's bad n both must work hard in this, cuz trust is 1 of the most impt factor in a relationship.. Then now is wen's wrong way of handling this misunderstanding... Sry 4 my words seems hurting, but tat's the fact...wen is avoiding n not settling down 2gether n both must talk nicely...but she choose 2 avoid cuz she's pissed off n scare tat she'll say the wrong thing... BUt i thing, she must be mature enough n dun only think abt her own feelings...At least sms br abt letting her cool down 1st, n think 4 his feelings now, so ask not 2 let him worry y wen dun ans his call or reply his sms...Tat's really not responsible n mature enough in this matter...Reminds of my past... terrible...Hope they won't like tat, but still young...
Nxt, we play pool...Well was oso very sry 4 Dawn... Cuz i noe she cares 4 me...asking me 2 c a doc many times, but i refuse...Make her misunderstand oso tat, i only go see a doc becuz of wen... thinking tat wen has greater influence than her on me.. But seriously, i'm sincerely sry... So then after tat...we went mac 2 eat b4 playing.. play until some time, finally br come n everything resolved...But br's misunderstanding towards me, getting deeper i guess...anyway, he still dun understand the real me..hope he think maturely as he grow up... I'm not this sort of person as wat he think... Well somethings hope he understand...i regard him as a bro 2 =) but i understand he's not 2 my age, thus unable 2 think like me...
PLay half way, many ppl come -.-! all i dunno de..sian... they play like dun 1 2 play like tat...makes me sian 1/2, then wen n br left halfway..then play on n off.. until 11pm, we all headed home... dun wish 2 talk abt such a boring day... feeling drowsy oso after taking medicine, + this type of situation, i'm very sian... though my form was ok ok...almost 4get, chat wif dawn on phone n get 2 hear her voice again, haha...Hmm dawn really cares alot abt me,but Dawn was giving me lots of insecure feelings...C how when everything turns out 2 be how, in future...tat's all readers...reach home tired..slp...

bubbles of sadness.

*12:19 PM .

Moments for Thurs, 16th Feb 2006 :
Hmm was punctual 2 work... Everything still the same at workplace...After work, meet a camp mate, Ah Tok, 6.15pm at ps arcade...Play a while of kof XI there...no challenger then go parklane eat dinner at mac wif him... Cuz throat not well, have Grilled chicken foldover wif hot tea...THen chat wif him n play pool...Haiz...Dunno y super off form... Tok's skill was rusty indeed...But he's gd at defence... Played until very tired maybe cuz of the lightings...At ard 1opm plus, we walk 2 the mrt n take train home... Reach home, online a while, then wen talked 2 me... both of us could not slp...me is cuz of my cough...getting worst...Then cuz my family wanna slp, i offline n watch NAruto2...
Suddenly, wen call my hp n we chat lo...Chat halfway, suddenly my past sms me...then no choice have 2 chat wif my past... Well listen 2 her on the phone, she said she got no bf....n claiming tat she's changed... But 2 me, i my heart can't feel tat she's changed... On the phone, i can feel tat she's still the same like the past lo... chat until 2.45am, hang the phone.. Well sry wen 4 not chatting wif u.almost 4get, wen told me 2moro she's not going 2 sch...Some more i was feeling very sick, tat i decided 2 see a doc...So she offered 2 company me see a doc..was afraid her bf jealous, but since she always tell her bf her whereabouts, then wif trust, so we go ahead lo..ok tat's all 4 2day.,,

bubbles of sadness.

*11:47 AM .

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Moments for Wed, 15th Feb 2006 :
Start work again after a day's break from the V Day.. Well Dawn's sms wake me up again n i'm on time 4 work =) Thanks n appreciate it. Well routine still as boring as usual -.-! so dun bother mentioning... Art ask me go lunch wif him , but 2 bad, my lunch break is fixed so cannot...as he need 2 reach his warehse by 2.30pm... Finally i had porridge 4 lunch in office... Then didn't manage 2 plan any activity after work, but manage 2 plan 1 the nxt day, wif my ex campmate, Ah Tok, hq armskoteman.. Thus after work, planned 2 go home straight n c how....
When i reach Doby Ghaut, Terrence called me.. asking me 2 go ps play kof wif him -.-! so late then call...wat if i left already? End up i walk back towards ps...then go arcade wait 4 him... Finally he came n i was enjoying myself wif kof XI..manage 2 find the same guy, which i always challenged wif.. arch rival haha.. i think he'll think of me this way... Hmm 2day really pissed him off... This guy lost me may rds...n the ratio was like alot : 1 of my token haha...if i can remember, i win him by more than 5, b4 i lose n insert 1 token..The highest record i reach, was win by 10 haha... His char was kim, gato (leader) n either maxima, eiji ... His kim was very camp n slam, gato was very dangerous... So was my gato haha.. i switch btw chars like oswald, kula, gato, iori, beni, n duck... End up, play until 9pm + i n terrence went 4 dinner at kfc (4 me) again -.-!
Well terrence tried 2 learn kof XI, but 2 bad a lot of challenger 2nite...Thus wasn't able 2 train n i keep rotating btw my credit n his 2 help him wif his game...After eating, Terrence suggest going 2 parklane play billard or pool...Then i choose billard cuz he 2 pro le...pool should be no cake 4 him...We played 4 rds of billard, time average 20mins + each game...game ended fast as he was 2 skilled... However, wif more practice, 1st rd i was trashed by him..the rest of the 3 rds, the score was alrite, quite close, ranging from less than 10 - 20 like tat =) Did a little bit of training, but still cannot play like monkey, can control the white ball, like rolling back after hitting, or place the ball like he does...After playing, it was 11.30pm ... very late...n no choice took cab home-.-! very ex...haiz..punish myself 4 going home so late... reach home 12am... prepare n watch Naruto2 b4 retiring 4 bed...2day dawn sms little bit only, but its ok =) Got a bit of quarrel i guess.. Ok call it a day...

bubbles of sadness.

*9:30 AM .

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Moments for Tue, 14th Feb 2006 :
Take this opportunity 2 wish my dear readers Happy Valentine's Day n enjoy urselves wif ur date on this special day, though 2 me, if u have a nice partner...every day's a V day.. Hmm true indeed was quite a boring day 2 me... until late afternoon... Well could have wake up 9am, but 2bad... slp until almost 12pm... Then use com n cook lunch 4 myself... planning of playing dota...yet only managed 2 play 1 long game, which my team manage 2 win..i used treant protector...randomed... Ns comes 2 my hse... Then i let him play n his skills -.-!! rooms 4 improvements haha...Well was expected tat my past really got a date, n was bluffing me.. as i didn't dare plan anything cuz of her, but looks like my guesses r correct, thus i dun feel 2 sad i guess.. Dawn oso cannot company me out, even though she very much wants 2...cuz of the family very strict n she's the only child, thus can understand her family's protective 2wards her....
Hmm so i went 2 prepare while Ns play com... Then everything's done, we went out 2gether..Well this time rd is Ns company me while i went 2 cut my hair haha..Well well this time i cut my hair at SP, Jean Kiat salon...$18 bucks -.-! cuz i was not satisfied wif the previous salon..Well new hairstyle new look on this special day, but 2bad, no date haha... Nvm... Hmm really very happy wif my hairstyle n will stick wif this salon then...Hmm after cutting, Ns took some pic 4 me... can put in friendster haha...then we went 2 arcade n Ns challenge kof 02 n XI wif me..well well who's the winner, can be expected haha.. Nxt kit comes n we went 2 take a walk n shop 4 presents...Well went comics connection n i bought a set of 1 piece small model... total 5 pieces, got tony tony chopper, the captain, the calafair guy wif the catupat, the leg guy and my favourite swordsman... Well chopper is definitely 4 our friend(New friend to me) Jiaqian...the rest of the 4, will be draw lots by the 4 of us guys, me, Kit, Ns n Roy...Since there were 5 of us celebrating V days 2day...
Next we went 2 gift land, i bought 4 paper roses wif different colours, the colours kind of sucky, but nvm la haha... though all suitable 4 gals.. Hmm get my presents wrapped there 2... Ns planned 2 buy a gift 4 Jq haha.. Well Well...end up, he borrowed $20 from me n bought her a big toy bear...-.-! ok la haha..THen we went arcade n play 02 wif kit n Ns, haha orochi Shermie, made them buay tahan again haha...Finally roy came n we headed 2 sem mrt 2 wait 4 the shuttle bus.,,Almost 4get, Kit took pics of my hairstyle when outside giftland lol..His skills better then Ns haha.. Hmm Roy dun like my new hairstyle -.-! but ok Ns n Kit say nice, odds 2:1 haha.. Reach there, planned 2 eat thai restaurant, full hse, long queue-.-! went pizza hut, long queue -.-! went sake sushi, long queue -.-!! haiz,expected, but no choice, roy finish sch late 2day.. So ended up we went kfc 2 celebrate instead...
Cuz 2day is special, our dinner oso special...1st time in my life, 4 ppl, order 2 family feast...16 chickens, 2 large whip potatos, 2 large fries n 8 regular drinks -.-!!! wow...after finishing the chickens, n some fries, we r 2 full =P thus we decided 2 play a game, using poker cards..using the taiwan variety show once again, "Zhong1 ji2 Mi4 Ma3" the number code thing 2 play... starting wif the fries, who ganna the number, will have 2 finish 10 fries... end up 3 rds of fries, Ns lost twice, roy ganna once... Nxt is the 2 large whip potatoes, inside got 4 whips... Well lose eat 1 whip...omg...total out of 8 whips, i lost 3 times, Ns 1 time n roy, 4 times !!!!! omg...Kit was so lucky...didn't even ganna...fries still ok, but the whipped potatoes make us sick... n even remind of some1 zzzz... the 3 of us really cannot tahan the fullness in our stomach... well we decided 2 walk back 2 sp... poor roy, the biggest loser haha...
Down there wait 4 the final person, Jq 2 join our grp after her dating wif Lirong haha...Roy was so jealous =P Once she came, its presents time..Well gave each of them a "rose" i bought 4 them, we the most girlish rose, of cuz have 2 gif Jq la, pink color de, i think quite swit oso the rose.. 2bad i'm a guy cannot have tat pink colour rose haha...then its presents time, Jq of cuz get her special tony tony chopper..n we guys let fate decide...KIT was SUPER LUCKY 2day..1st, escape the food, now gets his favourte n oso my favourite swordsman... Roy got the captain....Ns got the tall guy,leg man... N me ZZZZZZ ntg 2 say... get the calafair...using catupat...wth... sian... Nxt comes the big show, Ns presenting his present 2 Jq, but 2 bad, he's 2 shy...then we have 2 leave n Ns send Jq home, while giving her the presents himself...Kit went different way, Roy n i took cab home haha...
Boring reach home super early, as usual wait 4 my turn 2 use the com, then thought of playing dota, ended up chatting wif Jq n playing minesweeper flags wif Dominic, my camp mate... haiz not concentrating so score 4 -1..zzz...Then chat wif her until 12.30am, i went 2 prepare n watch naruto2 b4 retiring 4 bed...the worst nite i had...cough getting very severe tat i couldn't slp well...N thus, V day this yr, ended this way....

bubbles of sadness.

*11:47 AM .

Moments for Mon, 13th Feb 2006 :
Mon...The day which i dreaded so much, ever since i begin working... OMg...woke up late, regardless of Dawn's wake up sms..Goodness me, late 3 mins again...I think i might get terminated if i were 2 late again... Thru out the whole day, i was fighting very hard against the tiredness in my body... very sleepy..Haiz...after work's life was getting more n more boring day by day... Well thinking abt tat when i was at work, makes me more sick of such life i had... Hmm health was deteriorating day by day...the cough i have...giving me lots of slpless nites... couldn't slp peacefully at all... each time i breath, *cough* .... #@$@!
Lunch time, thought of just buying some porridge n enjoy it in office wif my com... BUt 2day happens 2 have department lunch...So went out 4 lunch wif my colleagues... Well we went 2 delifrance -.-! very seldom eat..ex... well no choice, cuz not very often have lunch wif them, so just company them... ordered fish n chips...cough le still eat this zzz... Well the soup was sweet corn, like campbell soup...Brings me sad memories..where i n my past cooked those soups at hers or my house..n share this delicious soup prepared by her most... though its canned but the warmest would always be felt n remembered 4 life... Well the fish n chips taste -.-! of cuz i will say, LJS or swensens fish taste better...took photos there n after chatting a while b4 heading back 2 office...
Hmm finally fight until knock n i managed 2 take leave 4 2moro's valentine's Day...Y do i take leave even i dun have a date wif my past or any1 else? Well beats me... Who asked me 2 celebrate 2 times of V day wif my past b4...Now suddenly i felt so empty... 2moro, 14th... is oso our day 2gether if we r still couples... 2yrs 5 mths... our days r always so nice...14th V day...25th noe each other, christmas... Yet our romance has turned 2 an end i supposed... Looking n thinking at the her now, even if she still wanna patched back wif me when i'm still single, i dun think i can bring myself 2 accept... unless she really changed 4 the better... Perhaps 2moro she already have a date ba,... SInce no activities..thought of just heading home... But a kof friend,Xiang Rong, asked me go sp arcade play kof XI wif him...Thus go company him a while..
Reached there, start 2 play wif him.. haha he couldn't take it as i used the unlocked chars, n have successfully get hold of their skills somehow, though there's still rooms 4 improvement.. Well played until 8.30pm..headed home.. Have my dinner, then watch tv cuz bro using com...haiz so boring at home,...Finally, waited 4 him 2 finish n i use the com play dota.. n other things else... Chat wif Dawn on the msn 2...Well at 12am, my past sms me... Well she wished me happy V day.. Well me 2...she told me she dun have any date 4 2moro..Well used 2 her lies...i dun think she wouldn't have a date.. But anyway, it doesn't matter 2 me anymore, whether its lies or not...But anyway wish her all the best.. Intitution tells me, if she won't have a date 4 2moro, she'll definitely ask me out...so 2moro's V day comes n i'll noe e truth haha...ok call it a day..

bubbles of sadness.

*11:10 AM .

Monday, February 13, 2006

Moments for Sun, 12th Feb 2006 :
A very boring day indeed... Wake up quite late or wat, i can't even remember... But anyway on my com, online...Then go install back my warcraft III n frozen throne n start playing back dota....play 1 game end very fast, cuz of leavers...haiz...waste my time..can't even had a gd game...lucky out of few games, only got 1 time i lost due 2 a leaver (a noob) in my team...At the same time, i was Dawn was chatting wif me...well perhaps the problems btw us r abt 2 end soon... However, future problems r predicted 2 arise....Finally can't stand it, manage 2 persuade roy 2 play a game of dota wif me...
Hmm he randomed venomancer while i randomed chaos Knight.. Wow playing wif skilled friends sure is different... It's really hard 2 find some1 who has a great teamwork wif me =) n roy was great...Our teamwork pawned tat medusa twice, using the same tactics, i bs medusa, using blink strike, whack the opponent few times till he starts 2 run, i stunned him n continue hitting him, while all these while, roy was whacking him 2, n he uses his shadow strike which helps me 2 slow him down... we shared the kill haha.. i kill once, roy killed once.. The game ended very fast -.-!! then roy gtg n log off...sian left me again...so sian...2 bad my com suddenly cannot c8 game... 2 bad... THen i got ntg 2 do...then at the same time, Ns oso very boring at home... So he come my hse play dota n use msn whil i go prepare...
Then headed 2 sp... Wow fortunate Ns...come my hse n my mum still gif him ang pao lol...We play kof n met jx there...after a while, Kit comes 2...Hmm nxt we go shop a while cuz Ns wants 2 look 4 presents lol.Giving who V' day's present? Then we headed 2 Kfc outside n suddenly Xinyi n Hong Yun called me..-.-! wonder how they got my hp no... Then so the 6 of us go kfc 4 dinner... Then some 1s 2 go lan, some 1s 2 go arcade...So end up go play arcade...Well i go n tried the dance maniac 2nd mixed marathon course myself...WOw...omg... my skill so lousy... combo only 1000+ this time n i can't even complete n lose at stage 11...-.-! play DDr wif Ns...Bloody hell...he always 1s 2 play tat stupid butterfly song...end up lose...waste my $... Play drum, oso lousy... dunno y...perhaps..2day boring day, made me do anything oso no mood...However, play 02 wif kit n 1 beat 3 him wif my Orochi shermie once again haha...Well he lose until dun 1 2 play... Sian...kof no challenger = boring...
Dawn sms me say she was having dinner at ps...but i'm not there, else can see her again haha..however this time she was wif her mum n cousin.. Hmm then kit n Jx went off, Xinyi, Hong yun n Ns wants 2 play poker... Hmm this yr surprisingly i didn't gamble in CNY, but since 2day was the last day of CNY, ok we went 2 mac 2 play poker.. Well we play black jack.. hmm at 1st, i lost a lot...Then in the end, i win back...Feel very bad cuz i won 16 bucks from Xinyi -.-! overall Ns i think is the biggest winner...evil sia he...Then have 2 call it a day...haiz mon work again...THink of V Day so lonely... very boring sia...Maybe rot at home play dota, than going out see so many couples ard...Hmm actually 2day thought of going 2 my ex-colleague's hse... but dunno y 2 lazy... nvm nxt time ba...

bubbles of sadness.

*11:59 AM .

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Moments for Sat, 11th Feb 2006 :
Wake up ard 9 am, but went back 2 slp again...until 11.30am i wake up... Then laze ard..online...supposed 2 meet them 1pm at sem mrt..however my mum wants me 2 have my lunch at home b4 coming out... Hmm... but turn out, many problems starts...Br's parents dun let him come out..Then wen dunno wat happened, not coming... So i called her n she was sad...let her listen 2 some classical music, instead of her always listening 2 techno, it calmed her down.. Ok promised 2 lend her the classical cd nxt time =) finally she's alright n come out 2 meet us.. Wil late oso..Cy n roy n Cr Duck were punctual..
Finally alll the ppl were ready n we headed 2 sp mac 1st 4 those who need 2 eat, then we headed 2 doby ghaut... promised Wil 2 let him play the basketball game a x-zone.. THen we headed 2 ps 2 company wil n Wen buy their valentine's day present...wa.. so envy of them.. THis yr was a great change 4 me.. though i'll on leave on tat day, i doubt i'll be coming out unless got ppl asked me out =X haha can't bear 2 see so many couples 2gether n i'll be very terrible cuz of wat happened 2 me... well.. took so long, then i n Cr Duck went arcade 2 play , nanage 2 win by 10 haha but 2bad cuz can't bear 2 let the rest wait 4 me, so i 4get the thoughts abt breaking my own record n left the arcade n go 2 parklane. Hmm Jq was here if us 2..
Reached there, thought of spliting in2 2 grps initially as some of them dun 1 2 play billard... SO me, wil, wen n Cr Duck play a game of billard n roy, Cy n Jq play pool... However they didn't play but watch us play cuz pool table was full... Haha 2day my mood was better n my form was back =) topped them, wif Wil 2nd, Cr Duck 3rd n expected wen last tis time.. cuz halfway thru the game, her parents called n scold her... Wif no mood 2 play, sure lose..besides roy helped her play the remaining game haha...as she was on the phone..
Nxt up, we went 2 play pool...1st tme welcoming our new member 2 our pool grp...n tat's Jq*applause* well Cr Duck's skill deproved a lot as he hasn't been wif our grp 4 sometime le... So we had great fun there, n listening 2 roy's "pink is good" stuff haha...And oso none other than the AC problems tat gif us lots of problems... Omg ... Well got 1 match tat made me heart pain... tat's the match wif Jq...omg... i was pocketting all my balls in2 the pockets... n was leading by alot wif Jq still having many of her balls 2 pocket, here comes the black ball which i have 2 hit in... Omg...i was so confident, tat i 4get the stop the white ball...end up, it was pocketted in2 the other hole...n i lost the match,.. N becuz 2nite wen has no choice but 2 go home early, ard 8pm + we call it a day..the 3 gals n wil went 2 ps...cuz wen need 2 collect her rings, Cr Duck went arcade play, me n roy have our dinner..THen wil comes back n we all headed back 2 sem...However cuz roy's family oso giving him problems...thus he's not going 2 sp mac wif us but heading home straight...
Thus only wil, Cr Duck n me was there...We sit n Cr Duck n Wil eat, n we drink hot tea 2gether...2day's outing got 2 sick cats...me n Wil...We were coughing non-stop...Gdness us... Finally after 2 days of no news from Wil's gf, she call n Wil was so happy... haiz...poor Wil.. Then Wil left us n me n Cr Duck play cards..haha he was trashed heavily by me... Then we called it a day... Well overall thru out the day...Dawn's problem was always in my mind...How i wish, everything can be settled... Nxt up, valentine's day... Omg...This day i dunno wat 2 do..Sun's activity i oso dunno how 2 plan... haiz... valentine's day how... 14th is oso the day i n my past celebrates....Ah heart damn pain now...

bubbles of sadness.

*12:21 PM .

Friday, February 10, 2006

Moments for Fri, 10th Feb 2006 :
Well was very emotional 2day, cuz of many things happened tat made me can't wait 2 put it down now... Not late 4 work 2day... HOwever, things btw me n dawn reached the worst stage i guess... I'm totally defeated against my own heart..Tired is wat i can say.. Deep inside me, i'm fighting against many things... Matters regarding dawn, relationships problems, my past...Even now, battle against friendships... my own future...my meaningless, yet stressful life... I guessed i have reached a super depression stage now... I'm completely defeated deep inside of my heart...wat a weakling... n yet have 2 be strong in the outer shell, the nv say die me in the outside, staying calm n cool n happy n couselling my friends who r currently having lots of problems.. Cuz they needed my support very badly... They can't lose a strong pillar like me, 2 gif them the encouragement 2 moved on.... No matter how badly ruined n decayed my inner side has becum, i must not be defeated n stand independently n strong by myself... But now... i'm completely breatheless... Urgh... stressed..tired... is my mental body really able 2 take it all these? not until my last breathe.... Patience.... even though how hurtful i am now... How stressful life can become...even such a stressful work just 4 survival...I guessed...i'm completely defeated....by myself alone....I wished tat i can went in2 hiding now....
Stressful work, problems wif dawn, fighting against my past, n currently the old friends problems... n many other physical illness n many other problems i had.....yet i kept them all inside of me... keeping n keeping n keeping as if ... there's still room 4 many space... Nv revealled 2 any1 else... I.... felt...so terrible... So sick... N now something even hurtful came tat i really gif up...This time is abt a friend... i dun wished 2 mention her name here... She was my (used 2 be best friend) friend's gf... 2day she chat wif me on msn...after so long, since the wow matter starts... n she was so angry wif her bf 4 so obsessed wif her bf addicted 2 wow so much.. tat their relationship went 2 a red light... At tt time, even when i n my past r still 2gether, this prob actually happened 2 me 2... I was so angry n hated wif WoW 4 snatching away my friends 1 by 1... At tat time, we used 2 share our sorrows abt wow matters n now, even from wat i observe, she really changed her ownself, which i believe she lost her true self unknowingly... n tat we really seldom talk much...perhaps of the misunderstanding btw me n her bf... Everything starts becuz of this stupid WoW game... everything just gone... N i wasn't showed respect at all as a friend even b4 the wow matter starts, but i still can take it... Now, after they played so long of Wow, 4get abt me, (excluding Kim), indirectly pushing me 2 my new friends, n yet they can still turn back n push all the fault 2 me o.O!! Damn unfair this is... Wat ridiculous thing is this? All these things, i won't blame her as she was my friend's gf, thus following her bf's action, though its wrong, but i still accept n respect watever decision she judges me as...Even if there really is no friendship anymore, they'll always still be inside my heart 4ever... Hence i wish her all the best n some other things shall be keep inside my heart, cuz its of no use saying out, as currently, she's unable 2 realise herself...Perhaps after a few yrs... she grows up n her thinking was matured enough 2 understand ba.... Anyway, things have gone, n i no longer hated Wow anymore... Cuz there's no point in hating anything, which will only made my life more miserable... Besides, i just hopes tat my life is already so terrible, pls dun keep having any misunderstanding 2wards me... tat i got new friends, no old friends... B4 we make a judgement, do think carefully wats the root 2 the problem, b4 coming 2 a conclusion, as it would b fair 2 every1...Haiz...go 4 lunch...
Didn't go 4 lunch in the end, cuz Dawn's having some family matters, just chat wif her n see how she is... Then comes all the boring work.. b4 i knock off at 5.30pm... Well suppose 2 meet wen, br, wil, roy 5.45pm at doby ghaut, but they were late..THus i went 2 ps arcade 2 wait 4 them...after tat, roy, wen n me went swensens 2 have our dinner..wil n br go arcade 2 play... having my favourite ice-cream in swensens, merry mint =) wil n br joined us..i intro the ice-cream to wil n wen.. After dinner, we went 2 meet Jl n her friend, cuz they coming 2 find roy... THen we headed 2 parklane n play billard wif Br, wen, wil, while roy company his 2 friends... Well super off form, perhaps becuz of so many problems in my heart... 1st time i was 3rd...wil 1st, wen, me then br... Haiz...
After a game of billard, we headed 2 play pool, again i was super off form... then roy joined us cuz his friends left... Then we played until 11pm + n headed back 2 sem.. Well me, Wil n roy went 2 sp mac 2 sit n chat... n play cards... Well Wil's gf giving him prob..no news 4 the whole day... Played until almost 3 am, we headed home...Wat a terrible day this is...

bubbles of sadness.

*12:14 PM .

Moments for Thurs, 9th Feb 2006 :
Well days r getting more n more boring each day... The recently colours in my life r beginning 2 fade away once again... Emptyness r returning 2 me... Wonder y.. Boring work, but 2day i reached work on time... N things btw dawn n me was worsening day by day... Problems lies in me n her... though i only got ntg 2 choose from, but she got 2 things 2 choose from -.-! getting more n more tired of these... When will she be able 2 realise tat her thinking isn't on the right way, not logically or rather not matured at all...She always thinks she handle the situation well but actually things shouldn't be handled this way...no matter how hard i explained 2 her, she just wouldn't understand....patience i shall have =) n perhaps times will let her realise herself, but as 4 how many yrs will she take, i wouldn't noe...Anyway, wish her 4 the better..
Well lunch 2day was a clashed btw $30 lunch at restaurant in dunno wat seng siong wi fmy colleagues, n having lunch wif art...Went end up i go meet art 4 lunch at ps... Raining -.-! so bring umbrella n go mrt doby ghaut's arcade 2 find art. He was playing dunno wat samurai showdown game. So watch him play n we headed to ps Bk 2 have lunch... Then chat n company him 2 smoke (watch him smoke) b4 rushing back 2 workplace... Haiz was late like last time, 2:25pm but this time was lucky cuz the rest of my colleagues were not back from lunch =) phew..Then comes boring workload..
Finally after work, not 2 mentioned same old problems wif dawn n i on msn, then 2day go no activities... on the way home in mrt,receive an unexpected phone call from i model company if i'm not wrong... THey r looking 4 my past... I was quite blur initially but later part i get the pic, after they told me wat its actually abt... Well on the 24th Jan, they spotted my past, dunno which location, they want her 2 be in the selection 4 i-model... Thus ask her 2 gimme them her particulars n contacts...ended up my past wrote down my hp no, instead of hers... Well 2 feelings came straight 2 my mind, 1st is either she's not accepting the thing, so used my no...But the most likely feeling, is the 2nd, where she purposely state down my hp no, but put her name, purposely letting me noe tat she was being spotted... 2 agitate me or wat i dunno...
I reached home wif a heavy heart...Dawn n my past... B4 going home, i went 2 sp arcade n play some kof XI... Reach home, have my dinner n online a while until 9pm, i decided 2 go out a while 2 relief my mental stress... Went sp arcade n saw Kit, Ns n Cr Duck... hmm kit n Ns go home, left me n Cr Duck, company him go eat dinner at kfc b4 heading home...Reach home, no energy do anything, so lie a while on bed, then online n kit, Kw chat wif me...Then realise sat they go outing nv call me..-.-! 4get wen this sat might not be free... So must plan activities as i really dun wish 2 the emptyness 2 come again... fsater call roy n haha lucky he agreed 2 go out wi fme 2 watever places i wanna go n sat. haha nice bro.. The rest like going Changi Airport again -.-! lame
Hmm oso heard from him n needa clear some misunderstanding btw a new friend -.-! Solving tat, watch naruto 2 n prepared 4 bed...Boring day, boring life...

bubbles of sadness.

*9:55 AM .

Thursday, February 09, 2006

Moments for Wed, 8th Feb 2006 :
Overslept n was 7 mins late 4 work -.-! Well really cannot take it anymore.. but must endure 4 few more months b4 everything is over.. Super sleepy day... cuz didn't manage 2 slp well last nite.. Wonder since when, start 2 cough -.-!! 2day can feel tat i'm abt 2 fall sick soon... at 11.45am, when 2 helped out at the preparation 4 CNY celebrations in Sub Court.. Well my task was 2 gif the programme sheet 2 the audience when they enter the auditorium.. -.-! ok nvm..then 1 of my colleague, Kamaliah, was wif me n she suddenly asked me abt my ex, n i let her noe the whole story tat was nv disclosed 2 any1 at work..I'm used 2 keeping everything inside of me le... Very terrible but yet struggling 2 stand up in my heart..
2 busy tat i 4get 2 help 1 of my colleague 2 go up stage 2 receive our badminton team prize.. Got 4th -.-! Nxt up, is 2 Chinese Orchestra Performers...Using Chinese musical instrument 2 play 2 CNY song. OMG, they r super unprofessional... They r real or fake de? Their duet doesn't make sense, out of tune, n both of them r like playing on their own.. The worst performance i have ever heard...Nxt up is a skit performed by staffs in sub Court... They r creative but yet the show was super lame -.-! however they did manage 2 make the audience laugh n be entertained... finally the whole thing end, n the audience are 2 proceed 4 buffet lunch.. My colleagues n i went there, but cuz the queue was super long n they suggest going out 2 eat... since i was alone, so i follow them but i buy lunch back 2 office 2 eat as usual -.-!
Afternoon, oso very boring n fighting hard against sleepyness.. Well at least better than usual, i push myself 2 work =) Then, dawn n me was smsing.. Well when she reached home, she online n chat wif me in msn.. She always say i close my heart away from her, dun 1 2 open up 2 her.. So 2day i oso dunno y, i told her everything in my heart... y recently i'm always like tat, as in, the problems tat arised btw us.. However, feelings tells me, she wasn't mature enough 2 understand haha.. -.-! hopefully i didn't waste my time cuz i seldom open up my heart 2 ppl.. Then finally knock off from work n Ns they all wants 2 go doby ghaut play dota i think, they asked me but i can't, cuz i promised Art 2 come out meet old friends 4 movie at sp... But end up no news from Ns they all...
Reach sp n i was alone... so i went arcade play kof while waiting 4 them..Art n reeni reach sp mac 2 wait 4 me, so i join them n we go food court 2 have our dinner.. Then go rockery buy drinks n company them smoke (repeat myself, i had a healthy lifestyle n HATE smoking) outside coffeebean or starbucks? Well after tat jim was at arcade waiting 4 us.. so they went up 2 find jim n i wait outside the arcade talking on the phone.. THus we went up buy movie ticket. 9.20pm show.. Well fearless again, but i dun mind watching it 2nd time =) cuz last time watch was sitting very front n oso its a great show.. Hmm then we went back arcade play kof a while b4 getting ready 2 the cinema.. Well didn't reply dawn cuz was busy, so i called her awhile only 2 find tat she's unwell.. Ok so ask her take care n suddenly something came 2 my mind, n haiz... my attitude change again..
The show begins, the same show i watched, but wif gd view now... I still had the same feelings like the 1st time i watched it... The ending really was so touching... However this time, i was smsing dawn while watching... Problems n obstacles starts again.. Wonder dawn noes wat actually happens or not... But nvm... suddenly i just stopped sms her, cuz after the show, art purposely bring jim n i 2gether 4 a talk n wat actually happens btw us.. Finally the Wow matter had been resloved, n i made myself cleary tat not becuz of my past tat i broke contact wif them.. During all these times, they still remained in my heart as friends...Well they r just 2 addicted abt Wow liao.. But anyway was so surprise tat art actually say sry 2 me =) well as 4 jim, i'm not sure whether he's sincere or not, cuz i can't read his mind.. But anyway known him 4 so long, noe his pattern more or less..Then art wants us 2 shake hands -.-! i'm actually ok, but i noe jim won't. Then more worst thing is art wants 2 take photo 4 us -.-!! oh my goodness.. Ok nvm being forced 2 take.. Saw Yongren n he's so steady...
After tat, its time 2 go home... I n jim left, but he walked ahead of me...Hmm i dunno where he go, perhaps go 7-11 buy drinks.. I dunno whether he wants me 2 wait 4 him or wat... so can't be stupid standing there, so might as well make a move home... We used 2 go home n walk the same path 2gether... Now really feels very awkward... I wonder wat he's thinking when i left wifout him... But i still waited at the opposite of the road n saw him,. i wave him a goodbye b4 leaving..time was already 11.30 n i received dawn's last sms of gdnite...Felt very bad, but i had 2 be harsh n cold at times... Though in my heart, i dun 1 2 treat her this way...but i'm left wif no choice, since she still can't decide things 4 herself, i helped her instead...anyway, reply her a gdnite sms n reached home online a while n watch naruto until 1am i retire 4 bed...
Something 2 add on...abt roy.. Hmm he seems 2 meet up wif the old problems from the past... Well btw his k n JL again.... Thought i have already wake up his sense already...but yet looks like i need 2 "knock" his head harder... Same old problem n wat we outsiders can do as friends is, only lend a listening ear n gif advice 2 him..At the end of the day, its up 2 him whether wat decision he will make finally so ask won't regret in future.. I always want every1 ard me, 2 think carefully b4 making any decision, so dun go n regret n future when its 2 late...tat's wat i always does...However watever decision roy made, we have no rights 2 disagree but must respect, cuz watever happens in future, its he himself 2 bear the results be it gd or not... All we can do is wish him all the best... However, i believe rite now, studies is the most impt, cuz ur future lies in each n every1 of ur hands... This last para is 4 all my friends, must specify a few names, wen, roy, Ns....etc..

bubbles of sadness.

*9:13 AM .

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Moments for Tue, 7th Feb 2006 :
Morning not late 4 work cuz dawn's sms wake me up.. Then work was boring... until lunch time i sms Kw 2 check the time schedule at the cinema...as i promised him 2 watch "i not stupid 2" wif him... Something terrible happened.. Kw did it once again... Need me 2 sms him, then only he gimme a last min thing tat he's going 2 watch wif a friend... Asked me out, i agreed n he go ask another person out again? Can't imagine how he's going 2 survive in his working life in future, wif this type of attitude... Moreover, he can still gif excuses like anyway u dun like 2 watch tat movie... -.-! Well he should be proud of a friend, who dun like 2 watch tat movie, n yet still promised 2 watch wif him, cuz every1 else has watched... All i noe is 1 must be responsible 4 each n his or her own actions... Promised is a promised... He really disappoints me tis time... Well 2 add on 2 tat, he's causing a trouble 2 me, by suddenly removing my planned activities 2day...Now last min, how am i going 2 find my own activity? Thanks 4 the deeds Kw, 4 repaying my help -.-! haha anyway patience... =)
At the end of the working day, still didn't manage 2 find any activities, but something happened 2 Cy n Ns.. Well the news was rather shocking, yet i'm still calm n cool haha tat's me =) Cy asked me 2 call her cuz she can't take it abt a news n was abt 2 cry O.o! ns called 2, n i expected something happened btw him n dawn (his sch). After work i called Cy n she told me Wil n dawn r 2gether now n she's heartbroken woot o.O!!! they r 2 young n immature n tat's wat i can say.. Having feelings 4 any1 was so easy.. Tat's the reason y, i did the right thing on my decision wif Cy. Can't possibly i made the wrong choice n end up getting hurt again by relationship =) i'm looking 4 a serious relationship, not puppy love nor crush or suddenly feelings which will easily change n fade away..Well situation was the 4 ppl, 2 gals n 2 guys, were friends n studying in the same sch, same age.. Cy, dawn liew (DL), Wil n Ns..Ns was in other class, the rest same class.. Cy likes Wil, Ns likes DL... Then DL like Wil, dunno Wil likes DL or not...then DL confess 2 Wil n they becum 2gether, tat's wat i heard.. Then DL felt guilty 2wards her gd friend CY, n confessed 2 Cy on this day...
Wow so complicated...yet 2 me, they r just 2 young..hmm besides tat, DL was like made every1 dunno whether she likes Ns or not.. n tat made things worst... A person really can have mixed feelings 4 so many ppl...-.-! Tat's the problem of being young n not able 2 think n treat relationships n their feelings maturely... Tat's the problem i dun believed in youngsters abt true luv... or rather feel insecure =)However, since i'm just a friend of them, not involved in this "4 triangle" thing, i shall sit on the fence n not made any judgement abt this =) all i can say 2 CY n NS is tat, u both r still young, dun let this matter affect ur future, esp ur studies.. In future, when u all grow up, perhaps u'll be able 2 visualise n handle these feelings things maturely...Be strong n wish them all the best n more over, must no tlet this thing affects ur friendships among 1 another, as its 2 naive if u were 2 break ur ties between each other just becuz of this shocking news 2 u all... if u r able 2 look things in a different view, n brghter side, n able 2 live ur life happily, means u all have grow up more in ur thinking, more matured 2 haha..anyway all the best 4 all of u =)
So i wait 4 Ns at sp arcade n spent my nite 2 company this heartbroken friend of mine haha.. Well we went 2 foodcourt n his friends Xinyi (Xy) n Hong yun(Hy) come. After eating, company them 2 a cc near my hse 2 play dota-.-! long time nv play... This cc really very lousy...the coms r lag, n the chairs r spoilt, n cannot access internet n go in 2 bnet...-.-! i'll nv ever go there again...even though its cheaper.. waste my time down there.. 1st rd play 1 v 2 wif Ns n a friend of his, i think is called Junjie (JJ) lol pawned them.. JJ can c tat he's not gd in the game, feed me a lot. Ns ok ok . haha. Nxt, me, Ns, JJ, n HY played against 2 opponent ... Well all i can say b4 we start, i already knew we'll lose... cuz dota is a match whereby its teamwork... n u cannot have a beginner in ur team as, the beginner will always feed the opponent until "very full" haha..True indeed, i had the least death, close 2 zero..JJ really feed them alot.. Hy n Ns's skills were ok ok..Except they need 2 practice their tag team... Hmm look 4ward 2 challenge them haha.. Nxt time perhaps...Played until 10, the shop close n we bid each other farewell...
2nite reach home super early...haiz ntg 2 do.. ended up online n do ntg.. then called dawn n we had a talk.. talked abt many things... and as usual same old problems.. btw something happened 2day almost after i knock off work wif me n dawn.. Well in msn, i asked abt the "recently" thing, which only dawn noes, n she say yes... n tat really made me feels very uncomfortable...Well dawn was oso young, n perhaps tat's oso 1 of the reason y i feel very insecure, other than my past, making me insecure 2 relationships.. I'm afraid dawn wasn't mature enough 2 handle relationships n her feelings, n things n her feelings might change went she changed environment when she grows older, esp from sec sch 2 either poly, Jc or other places...Well moreover now she can't even decides 4 herself wat she actually 1s, n yet she always accused me 4 living in my past n closing up my heart... I mean, how can i open my heart 2 a person, who isn't sure of things herself? Cuz its 11.30pm, n she needs 2 slp 4 2moro's sch, we chat halfway abt this n postpone the conversation nxt time.. Well after tat, it leaves me wif lots of thoughts n feelings, then i watch tv n then retire 4 bed.... As 4 the full details of the conversation or rather the problems or obstacles btw me n dawn, i shall put it in my personal diary, thus wat i can disclosed has been placed here haha..Tat's all
Just an add on, art chat wif me in msn n tries 2 turn things better btw me n my old friends, Jim n company..Well it seems 2 me tat art always feels tat i'm wrong, but i just ignore watever he wants 2 say... who is rite who is wrong, who is true 2 me, i noe... Art keeps putting gd words 4 jim they all... all i can say is, his explanations r biase as he is more closer 2 jim n he supports them.. I strongly believed in letting a neutral party decide who is rite, who is wrong.. N i strongly believe tat if we were 2 do a survey on this matter, more neutral ppl will support me =) But anyway, art keeps askingme 2 4gif n 4get, but being the patient me, i dun find a need 2 do so, cuz i'm not at all angry wif jim they all.. cuz i'm patient =) hahawell look things on the bright side, n just dun care how they treat me. =)In return, art ask me out 4 movie wif them nxt day... i promise him 2 gif them a chance n turned up.. however, if i received the same type of treament n have 2 c their face n show disrespect 4 me as an older friend, then i think, i'll happily turn away =)
Nxt add on is dawn again.. u think its my past dear readers? Nope she has disappeared like thin air wifout any news =) Well dawn 2day did it again.. She apologize 2 me as she was stressed in studies 2day n reach home, her mum still ask her lots of qns n made her more stress.. Told her b4, dun bring ur stress 2 other ppl ard u, as u'll upsets them.. Its no different from vending ur anger on an innocent person, who didn't do anyhting wrong 2 u.. This thing, i believe 1 must be matured enough 2 do tat.. anyway being matured, u r able 2 handle ur emotions well =) Patience is golden haha =) as being a hot-tempered person, does u no gd in the 1st place.. Well 4gifs her n hope nxt tiem she dun do it again...

bubbles of sadness.

*9:20 AM .

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Moments for Mon, 6th Feb 2006 :
Mon blues again...-.-! Work after work... When is this going 2 end? I'm going crazy over this type of life... Well if dun work, how 2 survive? haiz...anyway, will be working 4 few more mths b4 i'm quiting... Really have 2 watch my own budget n practice saving $... Hmm boring day indeed.. Well my office com has successfully upgrade 2 pentium 4 haha..Quite fast n i'm able 2 access internet once again... Everything was back 2 normal. except still couldn't install normal Msn...security super high here... Was very surprise arthur 2 call me in msn..He even ask me out 2 have lunch...
Lunch time, he works at farrer park, me chinatown, so we meet at doby ghaut....As usual, very late...i waited 4 him at the arcade in doby ghaut mrt...he was 25 mins late -.-! Then he wants 2 eat Yoshinoya so follow him there..Recommend me a meal, but i dunno how 2 call tat.. But got Jap fried chicken in it...Then was very shocked abt wat art told me abt Jim, Kim, Kia, n Lau eh ba.. I mean my old friends which we used 2 be always 2gether in the past...2 play kof.... Their remarks was totally 2 much n hurtful 2 my pride...Yes true enough, we were very close in the past, but due 2 many changes in their life, 1 after another, they abandoned me,... I felt left out in the grp...Wat's the reason? Its none other than World of Warcraft (WoW).. Yes, because of this $ paying online game, they choose 2 abandon me.. Each time outing, they would only care abt Wow topic n dun even spare a thought 4 me as a friend at all... I feel very boring each time when i sit wif them, n they would just talk Wow as if i'm not ard... Is this call friend or rather do they regard me as their friend in the 1st place?
They complained 2 arthur tat i in the past used 2 call them out when i'm wif my past, 2 tell them abt my pains wif her... And they would always come out...Then now no more wif my past, i abandon them and got new friends, old friends r all gone... Did they ever think abt wat they have done in the 1st place 2 me? Yes i find them i the past, cuz at tat time, they r approachable... Wow hasn't even come in2 their life... Now see them got Wow = no friend, r they still approachable like the past? NO lo..Some more they listen 2 me talk abt my problems, is just happily listening 2 my story 4 entertainment.. All they care is wat? they should noe himself... Dun even respect me at all...Eventually i find it very boring n left out, each time i went out wif them.. Until now, they pushed me nearer 2 my new friends n now they still have the cheek 2 complained abt me... R U PPL BEING FAIR 2 ME AS A FRIEND IN THE 1ST PLACE OR NOT? IF U ALL HAVE THE GUTS 2 TREAT ME THIS WAY AT 1ST, DUN COMPLAIN SO MUCH!!!!Anyway, watever it is, i dun even wish 2 bother... If they approach me back n regard me truly as a friend, i'll welcome them back openly...cuz i believe, there's no point 4 me 2 hate anybody as tat would only made my life miserable.=) Patience!!!!
End up i was late almost 1/2 an hr after lunch =P then back 2 the boring job... Until 6.03 pm i knock off cuz was 3 mins late again.. haha then went 2 ps 2 wait 4 art n reeni as they 1s 2 ask me out 2 play kof... Surprise 2 see Monkey there.. So we played n art started playing kof XI... Hmm we challenged a few rds of kof 02 until 9pm + we went 4 dinner.. Dawn was very upset cuz i didn't had my dinner on time haha.. Sry 4 letting u so worried =) But dun worry so much cuz i can take care of myself, as i'm always so independent =) We had Kfc n Ns called me cuz he 2day cannot stand 1 thing... Erhmm won't disclose so much, but something 2 do wif "AC" haha only ppl who noes wat "AC" will understand wat i'm talking.. Besides he's very worried cuz 2day he made some1 he likes angry haha.. So cute sia Ns... 4get 2 say, Kit 2day oso very cute sia, he asked me 2 write a testi on friendster 4 him, but i ask him 2 write 1st..His testi makes me O.o!!!1 n Impressive at the same time... So i returned him a meaningful 1... Besides 2day was very busy in office, cuz many ppl talking 2 me in web msn (readers think i'm very busy at work?haha) Well after eating, go outside starbucks company my friends drink, chat n they smoke but not me (healthy lifestyle haha). The monkey join us n we chat a while n its time 2 go home..

bubbles of sadness.

*9:12 AM .

Monday, February 06, 2006

Moments for Sun, 5th Feb 2006 :
Well 2day i had quite a long day... Hmm starting was another wasting of time 4 me.. I woke up early 2 update my blog or do some other things using my com, though i slpet very late, ard 3am last nite... Head was feeling heavy n painful...wat a terrible feeling.. Well 2day was supposed 2 be a day, where my past said she'll be asking me out 4 an outing but end up didn't call, just like sat, found out tat she lied 2 me n she find reasons 2 hang the phone tat her sis was using hse phone n she'll call later.. End up nv call..perhaps 2 guilty 2 contact me ba... gif up waiting n this morning was a busy day 4 me in msn haha =) was chatting wif roy, Ns, wen, dawn n nv expect Ns invite Jq 2 the conversation n roy was there a while... Didn't talk much =) well then i ask Ns out cuz i dun wish 2 waste my time waiting 4 a person, who's not sincere in going out wif me =)
Agreed 2 meet Ns 2pm at Sp arcade, but nv expect while preparing, my eldest sis n her husband come n bring her baby wif her =) So long time nv c her baby, so i played wif her haha. really enjoy the presence of a baby wif me =) Wow she's so heavy but i like it very much. Hmm noted the time was late, i quickly prepare n rush out 2 meet Ns. haha can c he waited impatiently haha.. Thought of cutting my hair, but since the time was late, i decided not 2 cut...ended up nv style my hair properly -.-! Hmm ask Ns wat 2 eat 4 lunch n he say anything, so i decided 2 punish him wif tat word.. I suggest going C'try Manna 2 have lunch, surprised tat he's so steady... hmm actually my friend was working there n he treat me a main course haha.. But 2 b fair 2 Ns, i decided 2 share the remaining cost wif him. =) Well my friend recommend me whole piece chicken set. Regretted listening 2 my friend eating ice-cream there, but Swensens is the best place 4 ice-cream 2 me.. Merry mint *wink* my favourite in Swensens.. Well The soup was great, but highly advicing my dear readers, not 2 order cuppacino(spelling error) nor any other coffee drinks in c'try manna cuz u need 2 add milk n sugar syrup urself -.-!!! anyway was very filling, ex...indeed...Wen n Br come find us cuz wen wants 2 return me the mp3 player n the cd i borrowed her 2 make a copy 4 herself =) hope u like tat album haha =)
Ok after tat, we headed 2 amk hospital 2 visit my 2nd uncle who meet wif an accident...So kind of Ns 2 company me.. This is the 2nd time le.. The hospital is located at quite long walking dist from yio Chu Kang Mrt... Well this time Ns got went n see my uncle 2gether wif me, instead of waiting outside haha.. Well my uncle was better than last time, but was even more skinner... the scene was very emotional... cuz looking at his state makes my heart felt heavy... But this time, he's able 2 talk wif me clearly =) i tried my best 2 talk wif him n Ns i bet, was having the same feeling as me.. But he was extremely quiet... My uncle was really very pitiful... Having many health problems n have fiancial difficulties... still meet wif this type of thing...life was really harsh 2 some pitiful souls in this world...Thought tat my life was already so pitiful... The sight of my uncle...makes me grief...
After tat, we went 2 our old place, parklane.. Hmm on the journey, nv expect 2 saw Angela loo in the mrt, wif a BF -.-! So fast? Hmm different ppl, different concept on relationship i guess...So anyway my respect 1 another n afterall, she's my friend n i wish her all the best..in my heart.... Once reach there, we played 2 rds of billards... 1st rd only win him 26 points... 2nd rd was a trashing match haha... trashed him 63 points n he gif up.. Nxt we went 2 play dota... OMG!!! my skill really covered wif dust n rust.... In the past, i'm confident tat Ns won't lay a finger on me =) 1st 1v1 of dota, the new map ver 6.27b... Well i random ganna keeper of the light -.-! n he got axe... Wth... building of item i turn rusty... then 1st blood he got me... keeper 2 slow 4 axe zzz... HOwever, he only manage 2 pawn me twice n end up i pawn him more in the end n he gif up... 2nd match he oso 1st blood me, but lost 2 me again haha... the rest of the match, he play little bit, cannot win me, he gif up =) after so long nv play dota, hmm hands start 2 get itchy again =) but not as addicted as the past le =)Nxt he suggest play cs -.-! even long nv play... Now is my turn ganna trashed... Well he's 2 pro le... Use guns, knife pistol, all i lose.... Admit defeat... afterall i remembered he played cs in wcg if i'm not wrong...
Nxt, we went 2 ps 2 have our dinner at BK... hmm then went 2 arcade 2 play time crisis 3 cuz 9.30pm already, cannot change tokens... Suddenly i nv expect a friend 2 sms me... My friend was out wif my friend's cousin at cine 2 watch a movie n noes i'm at ps... Nv expect my friend actually turn up at ps... Omg.. i wasn't well dressed n prepared... Haiz... was very nervous n dunno wat 2 do... So we talk on phone... n i'm at 7th floor n my friend is at 3rd floor..We both look ard n i think we spotted each other, but i went in2 hiding... Finally Ns company me down n meet this friend... Shit... My shyness n weakest side of me was spotted by Ns...Lost all the calm, n cool front of me 2 Ns... really super embarass... We both saw each other n both of us was like giving silly smiles n speechless.. I'm at the loss of my words... Then a few moments of uneasiness, we say gdbye 2 each other, n i n Ns saw my friend like running off shyly, wif my friend's cousin tagging along behind, the scene quite cute n funny haha... Hmm Ns's remarks was +ve 2wards my friend. Well ok =) My friend dressed sweetly wif long dress or how should i put it... Not bad.. Surprise short meeting ba.. Speechless... n embarass when i even think of tat...Must Remain cool n calm =)
After tat, i n Ns went on our journey back home =) we had a tiring day n reach home use com n my family was praying 2 the heavenly god (should i put it this way?Taoist ppl pray de ba) Then i call it a day ba...

bubbles of sadness.

*12:32 AM .

Sunday, February 05, 2006

Moments for Sat, 4th Jan 2006 :
2day is our outing day..However things changed n the old grps had gone... Morning wake uo very late n receive Dawn's sms...Saying tat i nv inititate 2 sms her...So in the end, ok i call her n chat a while.. Then suppose 2 meet wen n kw 12.30pm at sem mrt.. Since not every1 is here yet, i go specs shop 2 repair my specs n go arcade wait 4 them... THen nv expect Ns n Kit 2 be at arcade so early as they say they'll b going meet us at parklane later... THus end up playing arcade a while... I n wen go play dance maniac 2nd mix, marathon course...Long time nv play..sigh...THough i passed boys, i failed at a very unexpected stage...a very boring stage 2 me...Overall, my combo is 2k+...Compared 2 the past, 6k+ was lots of difference...I really deprove a lot...maybe go train back once again... Last time, playing tat game, attracts lots of spectators haha =P but now, dun thin kso le, cuz the game not so hot... But if combo can reach very high, then maybe haha... Daydreaming again..
After tat, we headed 2 parklane n start our 5 ppl billard game...Well i topped, Kit, Wen, Ns then Kw last haha... e only play 1 game cuz all of us very off form due 2 lots of distraction, except Kw n Kit...But played halfway, Roy n Jia Qian (Jq) come... Well wen n Ns dislike Jq, but we need 2 spare a thought 4 our friend at times, so they won't be caught in the middle... Situation is like this, Roy was at church wif Jq, Since they were 2gether n Roy was suppose 2 join us n he dun 1 2 fail us n have 2 company Jq at the same time, thus he had no choice but 2 bring her along... Well so 2 think of our friend, roy, we have 2 welcome Jq wif open hearts =) N 2 me, like a person is better than u dislike them, which affects ur mood =) Thus i'm neutral 2wards anything, n just treat it tat i have know a new friend.
Nxt we play pool, but cuz the place is very crowded, manage 2 get a table in the middle -.-! Roy n Jq opened a table n play.. Well finally managed 2 use my bro's cue stick.. Well was quite great=) We had great funs til a table a the corner was vacant n we switch 2 tat table... Then halfway, Jq left, n Roy was back 2 our grp..Ns n wen really must learn 2 accept every1, even our foes 2 be our friends, life would be more enjoyable =) Then we play, until Ns, Roy n Kit went 2 play dota... Then Wil sent Jq away, n i was caught up wif things... Well Dawn meet a sad thing abt a quarrel wif a good friend of hers, n she was very upset... Thus i naturally console n gif her some couselling haha...Well cuz i find tat, she used a wrong way 2wards her gd friend, though knowing tat she cares 4 her gd friend, but in a wrong manner when her gd friend meets something bad...That ended up, spoiling their friendship, over a bad egg (a gasl schoolmate i should call it)
Here comes the part which really spoils my day... cuz i was terribly disappointed wif some1...After so long of MIA, my past finally sms me n called me...but 2 my disappointment, she lied 2 me again... i think i'm really grateful 2 heaven, 4 always letting me noe the truth... On our journey 2 parklane at sem mrt, We meet Kit's cousin, Munling...n she told me she saw my past at bugis ytd, which is Fri... Well yet now, my past called me n told me tat she got no $ 2 go out n was staying at home, other than Thurs which she put my airplane, made me wait 4 ntg n claims tat she goes mickey's hse 2 "bai4 Nian2" Well Well, Paper cannot cover fire, ppl who lie, would usually be exposed...Up til now, she still dun 1 2 be truthful 2 me... Hanging ard wif who, i guess she should noe herself... cuz i noe it... I dun think munling, will be stupid enough 2 lie 2 me abt this as it wouldn't do her any gd...After tat makes me more worst...She claims tat her sis, mabel is using the hse phone, so she will use the hse phone 2 call me later, end up the whole day, no news at all... another empty promises n she really upsets me a lot... Wat a disappointment... Wat say 1 2 change, but by observing, she's not serious at all... I think she just feels guilty n 1 2 hang the phone ba...anyway, she 1s 2 like tat, i can't do anything...
My day was spoilt n i went back play a few pool n time 4 dinner... Wen was oso not in gd mood 2day cuz she was tolerating...at 1st, said going eat sushi, but end up went LJS instead... I can understand the things planned which ended up changed last min.. Cuz i always been thru this type of situation...Nvm we had our dinner n went doby ghaut arcade there 2 play a while until 10m cuz Wen needs 2 go home early 2day... SO we headed back 2 sem... N wil, Ns, Roy n me go sp mac n chat, play cards n eat =) Well Br sms kw n Ns 2 ask them take care of wen, lol his moves really makes me laugh... Anyway didn't actually cousel wen 2day, maybe nxt time ba =) N oso glad 2 see Roy n JL really 2gether le...
Ok back 2 mac, after eating, we play stupid games, true or dare.. Well I n Ns only ganna once if i can recall... But we played true haha... Wil ganna 3 times i think... 1st time he play true, 2nd time, doing 10 push ups infront of mac counter haha..3rd time ask him 2 get a drink n rise up the cup from the counter n shout out a type of drinking code n bottoms up the drinks, but he was 2 shy 2 do it... Ask him 2 imagine he has a dance partner, n dance wif "her", he oso dun1 ... wat a spoil sport...haha playing true or dare wif me or wif other adults, we always thinks of crappy things haha... ended up, his 3rd times, he do 20 push up infront of the counter again-.-! spoil sport sia...Nxt up is the most steady roy..he ganna 4 times i think...1st time is true, 2nd time is going 2 the mid of mac 2 do 10 push-ups, 3rd times go 2 a wall n shout 3 times "help!help! the wall is falling!" n 4th time, he did wat wil was tolded but using my bottle n standing against the wall he performed just now =) even took a pic of tat in Ns n my hp.. Readers, interested 2 see the pic, can find us haha... ok time is almost 3 am again n we took Roy's hailed cab home... Wat a terrible day n yet ended wif a laugh haha....

bubbles of sadness.

*10:06 AM .

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