____________['[*Moments Sharing*]']___________

*10:57 AM .

Monday, February 26, 2007

Memories for 25th Feb 2007 (Sun):
Wat a boring day once again... Woke up early in the morning.. becuz i have to go for Remedial Training for my IPPT in army. Last yr test i failed b4 my b'day arrived. Army requires us to clear IPPT test once every yr.. Thus 2 mths of remedial training finally started.. Hated going there, but nevertheless, treat it as a form of workout for me, due to my laziness haha. Well, reached there, never expect to saw an old camp mate of mine. James Quah. He n his friends oso booked the same date of RT as me. Every Sun 8am n Tue 6pm.. Looks like i have found a companion to workout wif me le haha.
1st day was indeed quite relaxing as usual. Just briefing n bring us for an orientation in their gym n learn the army standard stretching b4 any exercise... Then 10am + we were released. Even get paid too ^^ but not much de i think.. After tat, we went to mac to have breakfast b4 leaving. Reach home, use com as usual, do all the necessary updating n stuffs... Thought of going out, but in the end i fall aslp on my bed til evening time.. Hmm of cuz got bath n stuffs ok? I'm cautious abt hygiene ^^. Have dinner, b4 i pick up myself to go sp study.. Well bro (roy) wanna meet me, thus i join him at mac to have a chat.. THen he wants to eat kfc, so company him there.. ard 9.30pm Jim called me to play kof wif him -.-! since arcade closes at 10pm at sp, i go play a while... Then its time for me to really study le...Just spend my time reading at mac, b4 retiring home to "Bai4 Tian1 Gong1".May all my wishes comes true=P Boring day indeed...

bubbles of sadness.

*10:29 AM .

Sunday, February 25, 2007

Memories for 24th Feb 2007 (Sat) :
Dearest readers, i'm back once again.. This time wif more pics to share wif everyone.. Hmm though quite a no of activities happened on this day, but only managed to provide photos of 1 of the activities.. Well meet a long time jc friend of mine for lunch at sun plaza. Yup Yew Hao, my dearest friend. Its his b'day thus no $ to buy him a present, treat him for lunch instead. Wa... suppose to meet 1.30 n he's almost 45 mins late -.-! Big shot indeed haha. We went to food court to eat, cuz both of us weren't feeling well cuz of the heaty stuffs we ate during CNY perhaps. Spend some time updating each other, n oso recall those sweet memories during jc, which is our dance ^^. Photos? couldn't get 1 as too crowded at foodcourt.
After bidding him farewell at the mrt, i went to arcade cuz Jim n Nel ask me out respectively.. Thus played wif them kof 02 awhile, b4 its time i headed to my 2nd sis's hse at bukit panjung for dinner. Reach there ard almost 6pm. Hmm thus some pics were taken of cuz =) well, her colleague were there, but went off after a while. Hmm get an additional red packet unexpectedly. However, her 2 small children... were very mischevious..omg.. Poor 2nd sis n her husband.. Think they'll have a had time clearing up the mess.. imagine.. the nutshells, throwing them all over, even behind the television.. Tissue paper throwing all over the hse... playing here n there... I was speechless..all i can do was, shake my head.. The adults were all busy wif the preparations of the dinner... In the end, i just explore the hse, watch some tv show n my photo taking session starts...^^ Erhmm the photos shown were not in order...
Firstly i start wif my 2nd sis's precious hobbies.. Jigsaw puzzling haha... Here's some of her master pieces..

1st on the list, Mona lisa. Hmm when my sis becum so class? Her arts in crafting, drawing etc is very gd ok. Talented she is =) Recall pri sch or sec sch when i have arts, i always approached her for some help in the touch up =P Oops..Of cuz not in the exams, though i wish to put her inside my bag haha.

2nd on hand is this teddy bear thing. Hmm not really interested in this jigsaw puzzle, however, i noe my 2nd sis likes soft toys n bears ^^ Pooh bear. Older than me, but still like a cute young girl, her size was very skinny too haha.

Last of all, the most impt 1... notice y i took 2 pics of this? these 4 master pieces of hers, i love them very much.. 1st 1 was taken b4 the sky turns dark. 2nd 1 i took it wif the lightings on when nite comes.. She actually even designed the hse wif those lightings to shine on her master piece. THis is 1 part of the design of the hse which i luv.

Speaking of the design, i put in advance the last pic i took in her hse, b4 i left. This lighting was so lovely tat it really attracts me to its attention.. Too bad i couldn't took it, when the lightings were not on. All u can do is see the ray of light. However, under the llights, there's lots of shiny crystal balls dangling just below ^^very lovely.. Sry readers tat u can only imagine if u can't see it clearly..

Speaking so much abt my 2nd sis, haven't even introduce her to all ba ^^. Ok present my lovely sis to my dearest readers. Not her real person of cuz, haha cuz she's too busy the whole day.. Nevertheless make up for her 2 photoframe in her hse. 1st 1 was taken on her day of ROM if i'm not mistaken.. Too bad something bad tat day happened to me, tat i wasn't on my top form to wish her happiness.. Looking at these 2 photos, looking at her smiles, i wish her happiness. ^^ A bit of background abt my 2nd sis? ok just little bit abt her luv path.. Only got 1 bf, which is my jie fu.. All the way they date til they walk the red carpets together. How lovely this couple was.. n i really envy her.. Too bad i couldn't do it le, cuz i had a wrong move in the past, thus had a heartbreaking record.. luv was as beautiful as i used to belief, however, not really anymore.. Didn't dare to think so much.. Just wonder when will i be able to find the rite 1, just like my sis.. Not every1 can do so... thus i just hope..

ok enough of my sudden emo, now is the view from 22nd storey of her apartment. its a nite view.. I luv this kind of view. makes u seems so high, looking at the vast land over me.. However of cuz, the view is only restricted to the window size n my eyes... The world is actually so big tat wonder how a person can travel the world in 80 days.. Dun they need time to stop n enjoy the scenery? Some more at tat time, technology wasn't really tat great rite? U can see the world in just 2 pages of a book, however, the world is actually not...tat small tat we can hug it in our arms lol...

Lastly, y i put this pic last, is because i'm sick of eating... Dunno y recently really no appetite.. But i did stuff myself alot wif those food. Steamboat.. got satay, my 2nd sis's 1st cooking? honey chicken... ahems though not very successful, but as long as edible, gd enough. room for improvement. Ok shall not talk more abt food..
Thought got chance to play mahjong, but ended up no mahjong session again -.-! from few days ago, until now, didn't even touch a single mahjong tile... disappointment... ended up watching man u vs fulham -.-! watch halfway i left for sem.. Find nel at arcade, play 1 - 2 credit b4 leaving... company nel to eat at mac, cuz he waited for me til he didn't have dinner. THen kit comes, nel left for other activities.. Long time didn't see kit, so chat wif him.. THen bro (Roy) sms me n find us chat too. Lol suddenly 1 come after the other. So the 3 of us chat til 2am + b4 we headed home. Tat's all readers...Will update again.

bubbles of sadness.

*12:26 PM .

Saturday, February 24, 2007

Memories for 23th Feb 2007 (Fri) :
Well didn't have anything much to blog abt today.. THought of studying, but was asked out by jim.. Nv expect i go sp n he put my airplane.. make me feel so boring the whole day... Went to play kof to relieve stress, meet a challenger who uses terry team.. didn't really use my best team, but playing wif him was tough.. Long time nv play wif him le.. Anyway got lose n win ba.. Today was not a very great day...
Then nel n Ying Ming asked me too -.-! But evening time.. omg kof again... felt quite bored... Xiang Rong was there wif me so i company him play too.. zzz lost.. today wasn't my day... Play wat lose wat.. Then nite time, play wif ying Ming, Alan, Nel kof XI. Got win got lose... Junting come, ask me to play kof 02 wif him.. So i company him. Lol play until the look of his arrogant face was gone ^^. He can't stand it.. Til the end of the nite, stanley comes in -.-! n play wif me.. My 14 win was defeated haha. Ok call it a nite...
Went mac wif nel n have dinner. Chat wif him n saw Bro, Shimin, Sara, Eric n Jq.. Hmm they went for movie i think. Ghost rider.. Too bad i watched le, so can't join them, when bro asked me.. Then after nel left, i studied a while b4 i went home.. Wat a boring day.. even when i wrote it in my blog, i felt the same either -.-!

bubbles of sadness.

*11:40 AM .

Friday, February 23, 2007

Memories for 22th Feb 2007 (Thurs) :
Went out wif Nel, Cy, Xy n Hy to kill of time.. yup really need to come out breathe fresh air, b4 i suffocate myself at hm, stressing over several issues.. THis nel... ask us to wear nice clothes out -.-! We meet 10.30am at admiralty mrt station, b4 travelling to Chua Chu Kang. Yup long time didn't go K- box sing le. So went wif them.. Manage to update some photos to my blog so readers won't feel bored reading words only haha. We went for K-lunch sessions.. Hmm starting no 1 dare to sing haha. But ended up we got cy to start 1st n slowly push every1 for singing..

Hmm didn't manage to take pic of our food cuz, while they were eating, i was singing, entertaining them. Nevertheless, 5 glasses symbolise us ^^

I managed to gather them to sit ard n pose a grp pic. I'm not ard? Haha dun need to post narrator's pic inside. Anyway i'm the photographer. Taking pics is my hobbies too =)

Wow nel in action. 4get wat song he's singing le. Celine Dion - My heart will go on? Lol readers, This is nel 1st time going to K-box wif us^^ Steady fellow he is, but not always haha. Cool rite?

ok here's Cy in action time. Well i took this pic down becuz i dun have the opportunity to take pic most of the time. busy me haha. Xy n Hy oso 1st timer i think. But they did sing a few songs haha. i keep getting Hy to sing. Didn't took Xy n Hy singing, so i took it together in this pic. Xy was looking at the tv, while hy looking at Cy singing lol. hey among us, cy is the best in singing ^^

Finally i have been taken a candid shot by Cy. Was singing 1 of my favourite song, More than Words - Westlife. Singing together wif Nel haha. Omg i look -.-! but nevertheless, must respect the photographer, thus i place it inside.
Finally after a series of singing, they wanted to take neoprints -.-! Thought of tat, i recall some1 says want to take neoprint wif me, but i doubt there'll be a nxt time le.. Nevertheless, i joined them as i dun wish to pour cold waters on them.. Hmm publish inside here? i dun have scanner thus wait for the rest to send me ba. After taking, they want to go to the arcade there zzz.. Omg met a camper playing kof.. but his skill i must say, is quite gd.. but our joystick wasn't really working well.. shared game wif nel n hy only to keep losing..I tried to challenge him myself, won 2 rds, but lost eventually. Thus we decided to play somethings tat we used to play, revive our memories.. Wat's tat? its snooker haha...Here's some photos once again ^^

This pic was taken b4 my solo match wif Nel. I luv my clothes, cuz a bit like a snooker player in a competiton. Nel la, shld wear like mine too.. More professional haha. The score? Expected ans lol. However, haven't been playing for a very long time. My skills really dropped alot.. didn't really trash Nel.. But nevertheless, gd game.

This pic was taken after the 2nd match, tag team. hy n me against Cy n Nel.. Perhaps i'm too tired standing for long hrs in the game, tat's y didn't got the opportunity to take more shots for this. Hy was 1st timer.. Thus nel dun want him to be in his team, so i take him n teach him. lol he pocket the 1st red ball for the match. The score? Lol it was trashing. 156 - 107. Managed to teach hy until he can have minimal fouls as long as he can hit the ball straight ^^.
Finally all was exhausted.. N its time to go back sem.. had dinner wif nel n newspaperboy.. The rest all bid farewell le.. Then they asked me to arcade to play kof -.-! Ok won a lot haha thus didn't spend a lot at all too.. At the end of the day, nel say play everything oso lose.. sian.. Lol though i won't alot, suppose to be happy, but i'm not happy at all... How i wish i'll really be the happiest man in the world.. Not only small succeeds n winnings like these... ok tat's all le...

bubbles of sadness.

*1:58 PM .

Memories for 21st Feb 2007 (Wed):
Went to the library to study.. Xy said going to cy's hse play mahjong, but expected the organizer is not organize in the 1st place. Last min changes were always there.. Met each other once again in the library.. Departed ard 3pm + after leaving behind some short conversation. If things were to becum this way, i shall let it be. Afterall i'm really such a fool for landing myself in such a plight.. Told myself to strength my "wall" once again. n will protect myself from any harm.. Environment cause me to becum wat i am now.. N i shall place all my blame n curse to my surroundings.. I dreaded them all.. Anyway, having met, the me now, was really speechless.. Couldn't really thought of anything to speak to D.. If avoidance is the solution, i shall accept tat kind of hard treatment.. Enough of this nonsense of mine..
While carrying on my studies, Nel ring me up n meet him at sp ard 6pm..company him play kof ot relief stress.. Won a lot of rounds.. but i'm not even happy.. Even though i succeeded in some fields, wat i hope to succeed, i'm not able to do so.. Luv as i always thought how beautifully it was, no longer makes me feel the same.. Its hurtful n i really wouldn't dare to touch it anymore...Went to have dinner wif him n sit down at sp mac to chat ard... Due to boredom, we took 2 pics for me to update in my blog. Hmm come to think of it, didn't really took pic wif him b4.. So here r just 2 pics to share.. Ps: not vain to take too much pics lol..

I like this pic cuz on top of nel, the ray of light from the glass window, makes the pic beautiful =P

bubbles of sadness.

*1:39 PM .

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Memories for 20th Feb 2007 (Tue)
Today was record breaking for me.. Totally didn't hear a single piece of news at all.. 1st time.. dunno shld be happy or shld be sad.. Dreaded this kind of feeling.. unbearable.. i keep telling myself not to think, but mind just couldn't ctrl.. I guess the fate has already been founded le ba.. Tat's wat i set myself as a gauge, when such things happened.. anyway prepare myself n thought of going out to study.. Not sure whether woodlands library is open or not. In the end, didn't go there at all...
Saw Xiang Rong at sp, so spend some time wif him. Then jim asked me out for lunch, so while waiting for him, i go to mac to study a short while, b4 finding him.. Ended up saw so many ppl, instead of studying, play wif them -.-! Till evening time, 2nd sis is coming to our hse wif her husband to have dinner wif us, so have to go hm.. Tat's how my day is spent.... colourless day...Tired..

bubbles of sadness.

*11:30 AM .

Memories for 19th Feb 2007 (Sun) :
CNY day 2 (Moodless)
Another normal day for me.. Went to visit my 2nd uncle's hse at hougang. He met wif an accident n was bed ridden.. Movement is restricted for him.. Most of the relatives were here.. but not as like the past once again.. some didn't showed up.. I just spend the time watching tv there.. Watched a bit of golf n snooker competition.. Some of them decided to come to our hse, thus we set off... It was raining on the way..didn't manage to bring an umbrella along, thus just walk in the rain.. just equal the mood of my heart...Feeling of drenched...
They spent the time talking in my hse, n those common things like 4d, Toto, etc... bored... Just sit ard n listen to their conversations.. THen ard 4pm + , they left n i went to sp to meet kim seng.. as he asked me out.. Then i think i just spend my time there..as for the details, i can't really rmb le.. THink is i went to yishun to use the internet, due to the stupid family issue, which i dun feel like talking abt.. Went wif Ns, Xy n Hy.. Then they stayed there, while i go off myself cuz i dun feel like staying overnite.. THey play dota, but i just dun have any mood to do anything... THink tat's all...Hmm no pics to share for this CNY, cuz i dun feel like taking any pics...Will try to do so nxt time...

bubbles of sadness.

*11:20 AM .

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Memories - 18th Feb 2007 (Sun) :
CNY 1st day - (lifeless)
Wake up and prepare to go to my eldest's relative's hse ( my mum's side). Every yr, we only go to the mum side, cuz dad's side we didn't keep in touch. Now all of us were grown up.. THings were not like wat it used to be. Perhaps we r old le. No more, playing com games, no more card games, ntg but sit down n talk.. Just catching up n updating each other as 1 yr only meet up 1 time haha. Think our bonding starts to fade when both grandparents passed away.. I spent the time there, standing n looking ard.. talk to them, when some approaches me, or sit when there's space. The family is quite big i would say.. Nxt, go to grandparent's hse.. Hmm now there's an "piano" in the hse.. Thus i spent my time recalling the piece which i learnt it myself.. "Wish" - by S.E.N.S.. Not very gd though, as its years ago..during jc..
Nxt they went to 3rd uncle's hse..All nearby in hougang..but i was quite tired, so i travel alone back to sem.. Thought of going hm initially, ended up meeting friends in sp..play, dinner n talk... Even catch a late nite movie "ghostrider" in sp at 11.40pm... Well newspaperboy wants to watch -.-! so me n kit company him.. Hmm the show was average.. The marvel was ok, but the fighting part wasn't tat interesting.. esp the last boss.. "look into my eyes" then defeated -.-! a bit lame.. However from the ending, tells us tat there'll be a continuition.. Hopefully they'll improve on the action part, which is most impt for such movies, Then only we'll enjoy the show wholeheartedly.. Ok guess tat's abt it...time to log off..

bubbles of sadness.

*9:57 PM .

Saturday, February 17, 2007

Moments for 17.02.07 - 11.12pm :
Morning got a big surprise tat last quite shortly.. Received a morning sms at 7.15am.. let me have the feeling of things b4 the big change.. exchange a few greetings here n there thruout the whole day... Spend the whole of afternoon sitting in front of the com finally, to clear my mails for the whole of the week. Cuz some stupid reasons, i dun get to use the com very often. Hmm was quite surprise tat my friendster was quite active this few days, so busy returning testimonials to my friends..
Then played a game, which i have nv played for a very long time. Audition... Hmm got quite a no. of changes in the game.. Well think my skill was very rusty le.. Oso got not much mood to play tat game too, even dota i haven't been playing for a long time.. THink will only start playing again when i install the game back to the com.. Recently just dun feel like any playing games..Nor any other stuffs.. haven't been living a normal life... but slacking ard like a useless person... When can i buck up, find myself n lead back my normal life?
In the late afternoon, Newspaperboy ask me out to sun plaza to play kof wif him for a while. THen he ask me to call nelson along.. Ok since got ntg to do, i join him... Ended up, nobody wants to challenge me -.-!. Only left the malay boy, Awie who keeps "feeding" me wif his credits lol. cr duck play 2 game wif me, ganna 1 beat 3 for 2 rds haha. Awie too lol. ok then rush back hm for reunion dinner..
THis yr reunion dinner is different cuz my 2nd sis is not wif us. SHe has gone to her husband side.. Nevertheless, i didn't ate rice but just the dishes n the soup cuz got not much appetite to eat... Then play wif my niece too^^.. Hmm looking at her, my future is really unclear now... Seems like i have lost my targets in life.. OK then something stupid happened.. Again the same old bro of mine, who snatched the internet connection thus i'm using the com at Jim's hse to update my blog... Long story thus dun wish to put it here, besides jim is bugging at me to faster finish n play wif him -.-! ok tat's all for today. Wish all friends n readers A very Happy Chinese New Year!... THough i dun have the mood for this occassion..at all...

bubbles of sadness.

*11:10 PM .

Memories for 16th Feb 07 : ( Written on 17.02.07 - 10.38am)
Didn't thought of going out today, but my bro actually ask me out haha. Cuz he was leaving for Thailand tonite.. Hmm my mood was terribly bad these few days.. thus perhaps going out to breathe some fresh air'll be great. Hmm in the past dun dare to wear a clothes which i bought, dunno y dare to wear it today.. tat clothes is really quite attention seeking -.-! when i bought tat clothes, it really attracts me cuz really nice...buy end up didn't dare to wear until today.. Erhmm the clothes is not revealing -.-! just attraction seeking...
Didn't noe we ended up going sushi eat buffet -.-! omg going to gain more fats n weight again... We go wif Br n Wen. Really too filling le. Then thought nv took any pics wif my bro, so might as well took it now.

Haha i think i dun look photogenic at all.. Perhaps from young feel very weird, staring at the lens of the camera. haha.
Nxt wen thought of playing pool, but full house, thus play a bit of games, daytona.. It was really fun n i ninja to become 1st =P. Then time for bro to go hm le.. So wen n Br go shopping for new yr clothes, i dun wish be lightbulb, thus follow bro. We took a walk ard plaza sing.. Piano shop n the Times bookstore was the main shops tat we stayed longer.. Then headed back cuz bro needs to prepare for flight at nite.. I got ntg to do, walk ard sp... Then meet friends awhile, as kim seng just booked out from camp.. tat's all for today i guess....

bubbles of sadness.

*10:37 AM .

Memories for 14th Feb 07 : (Written on 17.02.07 - 10.25am)
Usually didn't celebrate V day till i have my 1st relationship wif my past n until today.. Well.. this day was a day filled wif mixed emotions.. Afternoon was a disasterous... cuz i met D to pass something n have a conversation wif D.. I tried to hide all my -ve feelings, and present a confident, happy me towards D... Well the conversation ended in an outcome which i dun desire.. Guess we both were really hurt... the wounds i would say, was getting deeper n deeper tat there's a scar already... It'll be a miracle if it'll heal back like the past, n it would be my greatest surprise...
Well evening time was happy, go Marina square wif my friend. Too many ppl, thus didn't watch movie, instead go ljs have dinner n ended chatting 2hrs plus... Nxt walk ard esplanade n chat till we didn't noe where we headed. On the way, got young children approached me to buy flowers, haha since they so "xin1 ku3" buy 1 from him. Then ard 11.30pm, headed back...On the way at sem, saw Hy n Xy, so chat a bit... Wat a memorable V. day!

bubbles of sadness.

*10:23 AM .

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Moments written on 15th Febuary 2007 (3.09pm):
Hmm i'm back so fast, writing again.. Perhaps too many stuffs in my head i supposed. Well tat time forget to mention the memorable nite (12/2/07 - Mon). Yup i spent many many time n efforts to prepare for this very impt nite. Actually, its supposed to be on Wed nite...However, situation has really gone worst tat i really couldn't wait an longer.. Each preparation i made...The painful i get, tat i really could continue preparing it anymore... meet kit 4pm at sp n he company me for a haircut (hairdresser busy, others cut...Not nice -.-!). THen headed to buy all the stuffs needed... i even searched for a suitable location for tat memorable nite.. i name D to protect the privacy of the person.. D came earlier than planned cuz sch ends earlier.. We met at 6.45pm b4 going to food court for dinner... Chat a while b4 i bring D to the location, blk 352C. Kit was there looking after my stuffs for me.. Thanks a lot..
Reached there, i showed D some magic tricks wif cards n D was amazed by it.. My intention was, because D had a long tiring day studying n i feel bad having to leave D alone waiting for me, while i went to prepare. Met kit, n he initially say help me set up, ended up i do the whole thing myself -.-! but its ok, cuz sincerity n hard work..Wa... things really didn't goes smoothly as planned... here's wat i have to say... I was sweating profusely just like the time, i'm inside army.. The sweat can actually wet my spectacles as thought its raining heavily... It was really very hot n i was sweating all over.. The heart-shaped, i adjusted n adjusted to make it as perfect as it can be.. THen i pour the red colour dryed petals wif fragrance in to the heart shape. then starts to light the candles... Omg starting so hot, then when i started to light, wonder how the wind manage to blow away my fire -.-! only managed to light a few out of 100 candles.. the lighted i just bought was so lousy, spoilt. i try using lighted candles to lit but was in vain cuz too hot.. THe candle is not long type... Wit came over me, to make use of the fireworks... star shaped..cuz D like stars... i placed 12 star fireworks n placed it on the candles n it was really very beautiful... However nv expect the lifespan is shorter than the long fireworks... When i brought D over, the fire works had stopped.. How disappointed i was.. Here's the pic tat is remained...

Not very nicely done....but 1st time i ever did such great thing in my life and is just for D. Great sense of satisfaction in exchange for smiles n happiness in D's face.

After tat, we spend time talking abt lots of stuffs.. Perhaps fate was really playing a joke wif us... dreaded tat very much... D made a seagull, i'll learn to fold it.. got a letter n 2 packet of sweets.. Dun gimme something tat is edible cuz i'll not dare to eat it, but keep it.. Ok now here comes the content inside tat red box... Got cutted straws n coloured construction papers, shredded papers, shiny thread llike stuffs, folded double hearts, straw hearts, paper stars n the most difficult is strawed stars... I got something in "return" for making those strawed stars for my fingers haha. Thent he pink box was a necklace, which was already put on for her..left the box there.. hmm pic of the box, my greatest satisfaction...

We had a great chat n really enjoyed myself, but time is merciless n send D home at ard 12am.. A very memorable day i'll keep. 2 letters were oso given to D.. Some other things very memorable were, HHH, AWH, AKOHC.. my own coding..cuz only for me to know n D noes it herself. Cuz it happened at D's blk downstairs.. But anyway things have comed to a standstill n dunno wat'll happen in future... A very memorable day indeed...Happy yet at the same time, sadness...

bubbles of sadness.

*3:09 PM .

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

14th Febuary 2007. - V day (sadness)
Wish all couples n dear readers a very happy Valentine's Day to day... It has been a very long time since i updated my blog once again... Where did i stopped? Well happy moments... Yup just like any sad drama, happy times r really very short..THis actually revolve ard my life recently, tat its really too hard for me to take it...Really very painful indeed... i'm just a piece of stupid paper, but not an sturdy pillar.. Y was my weakest side always so open? Where's my strength? think i really dun have 1 at all in the 1st place... dreaded myself for being such a weakling.. dreaded the whole of me.. dreaded everything tat's from me.. I shall not be able to open up again... The walls i built in my heart, shall be thicker n thicker, cuz i really fear of exposing myself to anything... Shall quietly hide myself well, in the coldness in my heart... THe colours which i give, the strength n everything, i have already gif it a person.. wat was left, is just emptiness n coldness inside of me... A colourless world...
Things changes out of a sudden, tat its really to hard for me to take it... 1 day i think i'll die from heart attack... THis is not a surprise i wanted... This is a shock instead of a surprise... Ppl come n go, in our lifes.. n yet of all, i lost to a very funny "joke" or is it a story tat have been made up to me... If it is so, if i found the truth, i'll be terribly hurt more than anything else... A stranger...is wat i can only mention in the blog... cuz each letter i type is like pinning my very own blood on it... if such things really happen, wonder will it happened to me too? not the giving party, but the receiving party... Will i be as fortunate as the stranger? i doubt so... All the fortunate things nv do really occured to me... I hate to be the giving party, if i could, i would rather be the receiving 1, rather than the giving 1...
Heart broken, tormented soul, fatigue mind n tired body... everything has come to a stand still in my life.. I'm now standing alone on my path, looking back n wait for any glimpse of the sight tat i have passed my colours n magic to... Everything i have done n really give in my best n everything.. all left behind is an hopeless, helpless me... Thus wat i'm left wif, besides waiting, i really can't think of anything i can do anymore... after this incident, i look from top to btm, thinking wats actually wrong wif me, tat i can't achieve anything? Am i really tat lousy, n wat the response n actions seems like proving me tat i'm really a hopeless person... Perhaps such a me shld nv even exist in the world... I guess tat's wat i can only pen down.. if given a chance to act, i hate acting strong in front of others, showing them i'm perfectly ok, even though i wish to show the soft side of me, but fear tat if i show out, i'll only add on to the sufferings n burden the the rest... Waiting seems unclear whether how the outcome will be.. Outcome might be waiting 4 ntg in the end, or perhaps my colours finally were able to catch up n found me? i'm really not sure.. This shall be my only wish tat i'll always made n i can finally reunited wif the colourless n magics in my life tat i have given away...Patiently n unknowingly i shall wait...

bubbles of sadness.

*10:52 AM .

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Moments of thoughts 01 Feb 2007:
Ladies & Gentlemen, 1st of all, my sincere apologies for wenting to a disappearing act for a very long time, due to many reasons, which i shall not use it as excuse for my absences. Nevertheless, i'm back in a brand new beginning, a new life... My blogging style has always been changing.. Thus this time, its oso the same, but its more towards the no of times which i'll be blogging. Though i might no have the time to blog everyday, i'll try to blog as frequent as i can, provided there's some incidents which i would be glad to share wif u ^^. Cuz my life has always been a routine eveutally thus its pointless blogging everyday, telling dear readers abt my daily lives, which might eventually be bored. Due to the revivable of my precioius blog, i shall continue writing n perhaps shared wif u my brand new life......
Life starts for Birth, or even halfway thru ur journey to the deathbed... y is tat so? Well cuz i felt it this way.. yes not the start of a brand new yr, not the start of 2007.. but the start of my life in my soul once again. When did it happen? well not very clear, however its on a fri i supposed... cuz the main detail is not rmbed i shall roughly fixed it myself... 19th Jan 2007.. an online prog, an msn conversation, till even now... 21th jan 07 (sun) is almost consider the 1st time outing, however there was a last min changes.. Eventually turned out to be the 1st is on 24th Jan 07, a movie apocalypto n the short interaction at mos burger at cwp... Nxt is sat 27th jan 07, where after an uncomfortable outing wif my bro to somerset, went back to cwp library to study, which followed by an unexpected dinner at mac which dragged til 12am.. The 1st sending to the destination b4 i return hm... Nxt comes 29th Jan 07, which is the 1st conversation on the phone which lasted thru the midnite.... Followed by ytd...31st jan 07(Wed), my 1st journey to the blood donation centre... which is not as scary as my impression abt it.. something which can be proud of... followed by a long conversation at the resting corner b4 heading to kinokuniya bookstore at takashimaya... read a small book abt astrology which is really accurate for me... Wif try to rmb it in my head if i visit there again n post it here....couldn't find any1 to company me for dinner, i was so surprised to see 4 friends at kfc haha. i was indeed terribly hungry n weak.. n blessed tat i won't have to eat dinner alone...they were sara, shimin, bro n eric.. since when we becum tat close haha. after eating, went to a nearby small park near my hse to glaze the dark sky of the nite... for past few nites, red clouds showing signs of raining, blocked all the beauties of the nite scenery... however tonite was special... bright moon which seems totally full, plus few glittering stars... 1 of which is super shiny, took a pic n send it at once.. hopefully it was been kept preciously... Will post it in my friendster... Finally a call, words from my heart, n a touchy incident wif tears, yet which ends in confusion... ending nowhere, but hoping times will move according the the rite direction i hoped for... 3rd outing preciously rmbed.. 31th Jan 07 (Wed)...
Well my life has reborned... the feelings n emotions or rather kind of power which i have losted for almost 8 yrs has finally revived... though not as strong as the past, but this feelings was powerful indeed... my confirmation, my firmness... the power to be determine n i'm not lost anymore... the path has slowly appeared in front of me, but its very mild n unclear at this moment... this power... would gimme the strength to really move on once again... Hence my wish... To really achieve this power to the peak n not lost it just like the past... i'm not wat i am 8 yrs from now... wat were the younger days, comes a young man, wif improved courages... Until here...my fellow readers...

bubbles of sadness.

*3:41 PM .

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