____________['[*Moments Sharing*]']___________

(15/12/08) Monday

Since I have some time in office and i'm feeling super sleeply now, so decided to blog n keep myself awake since there's ntg I can do on net as well.. hmm shall update abt my weekends ba.. well last fri, after struggling from the boring work, which seems to be getting bz lately, cuz this evil boss of mine, decided to make use of me to the last day of my work, to do some things for her.. ok endure 4 abt 2 more weeks, it'll be over..

I guess, I really need to take a short break from all these work.. however the short break can nv be a comfortable 1, unless I manage to find a job which allows me to rest a while b4 I start my work.. hmm kinda tough isn't it.. actually.. I hope to find a job which requires less travelling, preferably, stg which I can work from hm.. less travel, less transport fee.. less cab fare etc.. Hmm definitely save me lots of cash.. as well as my hp bill..

Hence even if i'm getting paided less, perhaps can calculate less than my current pay, how much less pay i'm ought to accept if I reduce my transport n hp expenses.. perhaps to the extent of having meals at hm too.. can oso helped me save a great deal in my studies.. however, headache thing was, to apply 4 a decent credit card 4 my education installment plan, I need to find a job tat pays me $2.5k a mth.. else, its really tough indeed... Times are bad now, my educational lvl still not consider high.. hard to find a job tat's willing to pay me tat much ba.. getting a decent credit card 4 my education fee seems impossible...

Anyway fri, I meet wil n ben at cine leisure after work.. well of cuz its saving $ again.. we play cards tog at cine bk, our usual place.. ben finish his exams.. so come out relax a bit.. Well luck was not bad.initially lost 40 bucks to wil, but end up, only owe him 15 by the time we finish our game.. ben seems like coming a wasted trip..only 2 bucks diff.. Anyway since I was feeling lucky n kwen didn't manage to find a mj kaki sat noon, but only manage to find a overnite kaki tonite.. so I make an exception but told him tat I can't stay overnite these days..

Hence ard 11pm +, we left cine n I companied wil to train n alight at amk.. then well to buy some drinks n swits b4 I headed down to serangoon, usual place at munheng's hse.. hse where lots of pets lives.. the room was small, so can't let ben n wil join me.. cuz think they oso dun like them to be stealing their skills? Hmm.. besides the pace was fast tat I find it barely to follow..wil n ben speed was too slow..

well 1st rd starts.. its the 1st nite, I ever win in this hse.. though the speed was surprisingly fast, but I managed to win quite a lot in the 1st rd.. becuz the time was insufficient n I manage to stuck as the host a few times, as well as kwen, so the game was a bit longer.. Hence we can only afford to play 3 full rds in 8 hrs..so each rd was abt 2 hrs plus.. This time kwen n our usual winner, munheng, win 0, nor lose 0.. only the 3rd player lost 60 bucks to me.

It was their frd, zhiqiang.. 1st tiem played wif him.. maybe he's unlucky tat nite.. so he transferred to me the $ since he got not enough cash on hand.. I tot its the 1st time I won so much in mj.. though think I lost quite a lot the previous time.. so actually got win got lose, hence its like, didn;t really win much ba..then headed to eat bf wif kwen b heading hm to rest..Then I was so tired tat I drag myself up ard afternoon time..

got myself prepared n headed to thomson hospital to visit my 2nd sis who just gave birth on fri.. feels weird looking at own family members in the hospital.. she looks fine, it was a natural birth.. Heard from sis-in-law tat she's so powerful..20mins duration n the babay comes out.. yup though she's small, but I noe she's very brave n strong willed in natured..glad tat the she n the baby are safe...

However, my arrival was bad timing.. she was breast feeding the baby, so I waited somewhere in the corner n there's a small poster in words, teaching how to breastfeed the baby or rather preparations for breastfeeding.. besides saw them cleaning the baby's backside cuz she just poot.. haha they look so funny, then while they make a mess of themselves, they called the nurse.. I just stood there n c how I can help..

Then managed to learn how to do it.. must be firm, yet gentle cuz the baby is fragile.. After all this, I headed to amk to mit wil, to catch a movie n dinner.. went to mos burger to have dinner.. We caught twilight but the movie was not really interesting.. kw says its so nice, but most of the part was like silence.. n the interesting part, I feel its only 2 short scenes.. the baseball scene n the fighting scene..tat's all...

After tat, we headed down to sp to play a bit of cards.. n omg.. I lost 50 tat nite, so end up owe him 65.. sian lo..regretted playing wif him instead of gg hm or wat.. initially tot of gg lan a while but cuz it was already 10+ when we reach sem, plus sun morning we nid to wake up early 4 mj at bro's hse.. so can't afford to stay too late.. So think tat's abt it 4 Sat..

Sun comes.. Its mj day again.. wil gimme morning call, and we headed to mac to eat breakfast..it was a filling 1.. Then after which, we headed down to tampines to mit ben, b4 heading down to my bro hse.. We started playing n today was a big day 4 me.. I was lucky indeed n was winning a lot.. his mum cook lunch 4 us, but cuz of the filling bf, I only ate a little at his hse.. Then we cont playing till nite time, I was quite unhappy...

dinner drag until so late n I have always hated sharing the delivery thingy.. well of cuz, being lucky 4 today was a crime? Just cuz of lucky, I have to treat alone.. I have to do this, do tat, wat about the rest of the days I lose? Doesn't it count? I wasn't given a treat when I lose.. besides sharing of food was worse.. I actually have to paid so much for the food I ate which cuz cheaper than outside..not only cuz of the delivery fee..its much cheaper..

I rather order some separate meal nxt time we had a delivery.. this really sucks..of cuz heaven is fair.. after the whole of 3 rds, I won 72 bucks in total..the highest amt I ever won in mj.. wil was super unlucky this time.. he lost to a total of all the 3 of us.. total amt of 97.5, clocking the highest lost in mj record.. he lost abt 9 to ben, 16.5 to my bro, n 72 to me.. Hmm consider last wk he win, n ytd he win the ah cha from me, still ok ba..

Well I begin to prefer, playing at serangoon..pace was faster, but a little too fast 4 me..Some more its really peaceful, though joking ard at times, but there's no extra ppl, peeking at my tiles or other ppl's tiles.. yes.. my bro's 2 frd, come to his hse n every1 were looking at other ppl's tiles...feel so unfair.. even so they say they didn;t teach, but who noes? The most secure or fair thing is, no ppl's watching n only consist of 4 players.. even if got extra ppl like me n ser, she play, I extra, I teach but I sit rite behind her, not peeping anybody's tiles.. I play, she watch, she nv say anything.. tat's consider fair.. my bro's frds, c, still open mouth...

Anyway, i'm considered lucky tat nite n tat's all for my weekends..weekday comes, didnt; have a smooth week start ba.. dun wish to talk abt it.. endure lo.. I begin t ohate weekdays le.. ytd was so sick n tired..call wil to company me to watch movie, the day the earth stood still.. my head was in great pain n was feeling unwell n cold.. was abit angry wif wil too cuz he only care abt himself 1st.. anyway the movie wasn't really interesting either.. not very nice movie which I'll praise..just like twilight..but its slightly nicer a bit ba..

bubbles of sadness.

*5:25 PM .

Thursday, December 11, 2008

(11/12/08) Thursday

Hmm didn't have much to blog lately, hence I didn't really blog.. Maybe consolidate everything, then start blogging ba.. well let's start wif work.. Well terminated from job due to the current boss.. been sending resume, didn't really have any news.. went for an interview at I-models International for the post of management trainee after work yesterday (10/12/08) Wednesday. Waited so long, only to find tat its retail hrs not suitable 4 my studies..Expected tat they'll persuade me into modeling.. Hmm well if they really want to help me, they would already have ways to ease the payment of the port folios..

Ntg else on work, except some jobs emailed me to send the resume, recent photo to them.. tat's abt it so far.. my HP is still silent.. at job still enduring the boss's face n attitiude.. but at times its relax till I'm super bored cuz I can't even do anything even if I'm bored...Finding work is always the case, where the jobs which I desire, didn;t get back to me, only those which I'm not really keen but trying my luck upon reached me.. which turns out not gd..

Family, had a big commotion over the weekends.. mum nagging n scolding me for long hrs.. of cuz some1 act big in the hse, got do stg la.. anyway i'm super stressed.. yet I have nobody who can comfort me.. instead, I felt worst.. some more at tat point of time, it was a hell at hm n I can't wait to leave the hse.. if really I have the cash..i wouldn;t feel so trouble.. I dun have to c ppl's attitude at work, dun have to c faces in the family, I can go out rent my own rm, I dun have to owe anybody a favours n end up enduring their attitudes as though I owe them my life..

Money just sucks.. I hate them yet I need them badly.. r/s wise, ntg to update.. as usual its gg up n downs.. gd times turn bad times again.. it has always been a cycle.. i'm so tired... at such times, I really can't afford to add on stress to myself.. if the r/s is gg to add on to my load, its really too hard 4 me to handle... I'm currently experiencing a very rough time in my life.. I seriously nid some1 supportive n understanding.. dun have to lighten my load, but at least dun add on to it..

health, is still fluctuating.. ppl ard me coughing, i'm oso coughing,.. now I'm still coughing.. having an irritated throat.. the doctor's prescription still haven;t cured me fully.. sian lo I wasted dunno how many $ on doc le.. now currently dunno wat's wrong again.. ytd I'm having a flu, today i'm having a burned lips.. Wonder when will I fully recover from the illness.. being alive on earth, is really tough...

As 4 activities wise.. actually is boring.. but wat to do, besides this, there's ntg I can do.. cuz other activities nid physical $.. and my $ is getting lesser n lesser.. the only thing is doing unwise activities but at the same time, dun nid to spend too much.. but its a gamble ba.. I mean even if lose, dun have to pay immediately, unlike gg lan, or go out like tat.. the $ is flowing out immediately, depending on the amt of $ I have...

Wat else, mahjong n cards is wat i'm playing over the weekends n some weekdays nite wif wil.. Sian lo.. maybe i'm not smooth in my life tat watever I play, I didn;t win..erhmm but this super long weekend, I so called got recover a bit of my losses la.. sat I went serangoon to play wif kwen n his frds mj, well I managed to win 20.. recover my losses for the previous week.. I lost almost 50.. overall stilll lose la.. but yet I have to take cab hm.. waste $..

Then sun play wif wil, ben at bro's hse.. Ser played b4 she went 4 the frd's wedding dinner.. we won 4.80 b4 she left.. I take over.. wa.. hard luck.. in the end of the game, I lost 4.50.. wil was so lucky cuz duck is a horse.. so brings luck to wil who's a snake.. it has been tested cuz tat time bro's grandma, a horse oso brings luck to wil.. n he won a lot.. duck 1st time join us, breaks my record of having losing the most.. In actual he lost 83.. but since he 1st time here, they nv times 1.5 to his lost..

Well cards game I lost to wil as usual.. Nvm,, wait 4 ben to finish his exams, n its time we 3 play tog, n I have to dep on ben to recover my losses too haha.Anyway other game is PSP which ding lend me.. I'm not into Bleach RPG game, I started playing n feel the urge to complete it.. Sian i'm worried i'm not able to complete b4 26 dec, but promise to rtn at tat time, so have to rtn by then ba.. but he wants it back to borrow his cousin, so c whether he can hold until 26 dec then take back or not hehe..(begging ding)

Erhmm think tat's ntg else 4 me to blog le ba.. can't think of anymore things to blog..i stop 4 now, n awaits the weekends to come again.. endure a few more days my suffering at the workplace will be over... but comes other sufferings...I lost.. I dunno which path I can take in my life.. Felt so helpless.. Just hope 2009 will be a better year ahead..

bubbles of sadness.

*2:33 PM .

Wednesday, December 03, 2008

Random updates

Haven't been blogging 4 some time again. Starting to slack again? Hmm perhaps so.. Its really hard to kip blogging almost every day isn't it? Oso becuz the incidents were either monotonous or there's ntg really interesting to blog abt.. ya.. life is boring indeed.. Study is a must, work is a must, wat's left is free time.. but there isn't really free time either...$ is oso a very crucial factor, so is other ppl ard us.. Life on earth is really tough..

need to recall all the way back.. Well its all a link ba.. i'm gonna be out of job soon.. Dec 26 marks my last day at work.. Even so, there's gd or bad wif this piece of news.. gd in the short run, bad in the long run? The gd thing is, I dun have to endure tat attitude from my new manager.. I really dislike her to the core.. fancy showing her attitude on me.. as though I owe her lots of thing like tat.. i'm really unhappy at work, dreaded gg to work each day..

imagine, our life is so short, yet most of the time, 1 week, I need to contribute so long at work.. 5 days.. waste time travelling to n fro to work, n spend 9 – 6 pm at work, by the time reach hm, its already so late.. can;t even relax a while, nid to slp n time to prepare 4 work the nxt day.. our body, to stay healthy, we nid 8 hrs of slp.. lets do a calculation.. 8 hrs of slp per day, in 1 week, 56 hrs gone.. every day, we r left wif 16hrs.. reduce the min of 3 meals per day, lets say, 1 hr each.. for breakfast, the 1 hr maybe can include snack times etc..

hence we r left wif each day, 13 hrs.. minus the bathing time n wash rm, perhaps 1 hr, each day left wif 12 hrs.. travelling maybe 3hrs to be max, left wif 10 hrs.. minus off work 8 hrs on weekdays, only left wif 2 hrs to relax... 2 hrs multiply by 5 workdays, is 10 hrs.. add 20 hrs on week ends is 30 hrs of break time.. compared to work is 8hrs multiply by 5, 40 hrs.. still imbalance.. if work is reduced to 7 hrs per day, 35 hrs.. then break time is oso 35 hrs.. then tat'll be great..

however, even such division, its oso not balance, esp to poorer ppl...$ is still the root cuz.. y must god create such things like $?.. wifout $, the poorer ppl, gets worst life.. like me, consider poor, though still fortunate than many other ppl out there.. llife is even more tough n stressful.. I need to contribute time to study n work at the same time.. more deprive from the relief from daily stress.. my life expectancy sure lowers down..

if only there's no $ in this world, I can solely study.. grad smoothly, switch from study to work.. though this time, the purpose of not working 4 $ is there, but at least god wan us to do stg, to work 4 stg.. its still there.. sense of achievement in life.. isn;t it more useful n meaningful? Rather than being force to work, for sole survival.. this world now...the rich is getting richer..wat abt the poor? Life is getting even more tougher.. still $ is the root cuz...

$ is oso nid to buy health.. tat's even worst.. no $, can;t even c a doc.. hmm anyway tis is just the small factor to look at.. enough of complaining ba.. cuz if wan to speak abt this, it can stretch all the way to the global matter.. i'm just a tiny bit of the whole world.. perishable as well.. just hope my life can come n go smoothly.. which in fact its the opposite.. Work is like tis, once out of job, i'm gonna be wondering when I'll get a job soon.. economy is down now.. hard to find a job..

Went for mj session on sat wif kwen, jackson at mun heng's hse at serangoon, jackson told me, there's actually such things.. the manager rob the worker's aws, in such a manner.. terminating the contract or remove the worker from the post, b4 the time 4 aws arrive, usually end of the yr, the worker's aws is eaten up, n manager in turn, gets a higher aws.. huh? Now then I noe there's such a logic in this working society.. its inhumanity..

I hate working under such person.. yes I was being terminated way few days b4 I'm getting my AWS.. I nid tat $ lo.. This really sucks.. She purposely terminate me at such time, where we r already having conflicts wif each other rite mths b4.. must wait till I endure until now, she terminate me.. This sucks.. I actually feeling like leaving immediately since she gave me a choice of need not serve the 1 mth's notice.. but jackson oso rule a possibility tat she's removing me to let her frd enter the company.. tat's worst..

but after some valuable advice from my previous agency, I decided to stay n serve the full notice.. though now its worst.. have to endure her attitude, let her bully n throw work at me.. no choice.. my agency says i'll still be paid during holidays.. dun quit so I can still earn the $ 4 tat holi.. some more dec got 2 holidays..n x'mas eve is half day.. not worth it if I leave now...hence endure..

tat's all abt work.. comes health..i have been sick 4 weeks...ytd, Tue, 2nd dec, I went to c a doc again.. doc r kind on the outside, but think their aim is to suck $ only.. go so many times, the med they give, like nv recover de.. dun pay how many fees 4 the doc le..ytd then only he starts giving me a stronger dose.. it cost 59 bucks!!!my studies have been affect too.. from work stress, health down..

start to skip a bit of lessons le.. when recover, nid to discipline myself to sch again.. transport fee is so high.. I really hope i'm “Jumper” from the movie.. or have doraemon, or super powers.. just in a swift, I can reach the destination.. dun nid pay $ 4 transport.. nxt comes r/s.. I really dunno wat to say la.. its in a mess.. always like a weather, rainy, then sunny, then storm, etc.. its really super unstable.. i'm so tired of all this.. it just adds on to the stress factor n its getting hard 4 me to manage..

when gd, its very gd..when its bad its extreme.. I can really feel tat the bad is strongly more than the gd.. to the extent it can offset the gd.. the r/s really shakes the calmess n peacefulness in me.. recently back tog, then another moment, breaks apart again.. I seriously need some1 who can really understand me n spare a tot 4 my feelings.. which i'm seriously deprive n lack of this in the r/s..

anyway, wat else to update abt? Fri go prata place wif kit, nel, ding n jason bear.. I ate a combo prata n banana prata.. actually ntg special..ah mei cafe, i'm contented wif the prata there.. 2 prata makes me full le.. then after tat, go lan shop wif ding n nel.. zzz, i'm sitting in the middle, both of the coughing.. I get both... n the 3 of us..cough... then after tat when to find her.. sat mj, from noon to nite.. lose $... recently kip losing.. dunno y..

munheng win the 3 of us.. at the end of everything, I lost the most.. 49 bucks..played 30-60, then after tat divided by 2.. jackson lost abt 38 only.. kwen lose 25.. munheng win 100+.. really lucky him.. sun, went out wif wil n ding... watch movie, quarantine.. well.. movie so so only.. the camera not very gd.. always shaking n its very annoying.. its thru out the movie like this..starting was boring indeed..average movie ba..

Then go play cards at amk hub mac..from win, end up lose oso.. lose 35 I think..mon, went work, then went hm eat dinner... ding come to collect comics from my hse..then we go sp tog..got the dvd sales at 1st lvl again.. so went to take a look..wan find Les Miserables.. then after tat, we went to mac n we play psp tog..ytd..work, coughing badly until I become a noise pollution.. so went to c a doc instead..

then go play kof awhile, then wil n ding come..go mac sit n play cards a while.. lose again, but manage to clear a bit of the losses.. think tat's all I have to say ba.. quarrel again wif some1.. think pms or wat ba.. she always like tat de.. like wat I say...bad is more than gd.. pms like so long like tat.. 1 month, like 20 days pms, 10 days normal.. tat's all I have to say ba..

bubbles of sadness.

*2:58 PM .

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